I swear to the STARS (meaning, of course, A-list celebrities) that headline-writers are doing this on purpose. Dig it: "Delaware police inquire about teenager’s interaction with Weiner." Or this one: "Delaware teen questioned about Weiner," changed when you click through, at least, to "Delaware police investigate contact between teen, Rep. Anthony Weiner." As for the actual story here? In a scandal that refuses to die, we now find that yes, Anthony Weiner kinda creepily PM'ed with a 17-year-old, but—for now—everyone says the messages were harmless.

Also you know what? About 24,000 pages of Sarah Palin's emails were released yesterday! On paper. The Guardian's assessment thus far:

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What do they say? The short-time Alaska governor feels strongly about the Christian notion of god. She was a somewhat credible governor obsessed with her image. She didn't see the whole VP thing coming, despite high hopes.

Um, Pakistan? This is why no one told you about the Osama bin Laden assassination. Twice in recent weeks the United States leaked a little intelligence about militant camps, and twice those camps were cleared out before the big guns could show up. And here you'd think security forces would be too busy apologizing for gunning down an teenager on video.

Still happening:
Middle East mayhem and unrest, tragedy, rumors, killings, etc.

It's not a British pensioner on holiday
in Germany, but the American stock market has spent weeks pissing water out its ass all the same.

The Morrison Bridge
is about to get a sticky-icky new surface, kissing good-bye its fatal steel grates.

An increasingly difficult to ignore
eight gang-related shootings in two weeks sparks serious responses from the mayor's office, police bureau, and Multnomah County.

A buffet lunch for $2.62 million?
Richly marbled Kobe beef on carving stations made of solid gold? A pop machine that dispenses Cristal? Sterling silver vomit buckets? Piles of Almas caviar? I bet if you get there right before dinner service starts, you can still pay the lunch price! Oh. Wait. I see what I did right there. A lunch with Warren Buffett. Yawn.

HE WOULD ROLL OVER IN HIS COFFIN. IF THERE WAS ROOM FOR SUCH A MANOEUVRE.