GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! Send it in a letter baby, tell you on the phone, I'm not the kinda girl who likes to be alone. Let's go to press!

The second GOP nominee debate is tonight, featuring Romney, Pawlenty, Bachmann, Gingrich and more. Place yer bet on who's gonna be the dumbest!

The FBI is giving their agents more freedom to search databases, send out surveillance teams, and dig through your trash (so please be considerate when throwing away condoms and tampons).

Doctors and nurses in Bahrain today go on trial, accused of taking patients prisoner and hoarding weapons—they say they were actually being set up and tortured by the government. GOSH. I don't know who to believe! (Yes, I do.)

Is the "Gay Girl in Damascus" blog actually a hoax? (NOTE: People on the internet NEVER hide their identities.)

Meanwhile, Syrians flee across the border to Turkey refugee camps to escape the latest government crackdown.

Citigroup waited up to THREE WEEKS before telling their customers that their accounts had been hacked. In three weeks I'm gonna let these guys know they really suck.

Get well wishes to E Street saxophonist Clarence Clemons who suffered a stroke over the weekend.

The Dallas Mavericks are the NBA champs! (This has been your "Basketball: the Sport of Fools" update.)

Expect some traffic delays as the bridges raise between now and 11 am and 4 and 6 pm, as the Fleet Week sailors shove off. ("Don't leave me, Yeoman Meesters! I'm having your baby!!")

Now here's what's going on in your neck of the woods: Showers are stopping leading to a partly cloudy, but largely dry week in the upper 60s and low 70s!

And finally, HEY HETEROS! The Broadway Theater is not just for the gays (and Jews) anymore! (At least according to this legitimately HILARIOUS and subversive opening number from Neil Patrick Harris at the Tony Awards!)