The rightwing haters were a little upset when I called Antonin Scalia a cocksucker in Newsweek and Jane Lynch seconded me:

Newsweek: How long until there’s an openly gay president or Supreme Court justice?

Savage: Scalia isn’t gay?!? I always think the biggest homophobe in the room is clearly a cocksucker.

Lynch: Totally! The next religious person who tells you there’s something wrong with being a homosexual, start the countdown. It’s Psychology 101—the people who are the loudest and hate it the most hate something in themselves.

"Absolutely every traditionally religious person is homosexual?" asked buttsore Newsbuster Tim Graham.

Not every professional homophobe is a homosexual, Tim, although picturing you being lead out of a truckstop toilet in handcuffs doesn't exactly strain any brain muscles. But as we've seen repeatedly (Haggard, Rekers, Craig, et al), there is a strong correlation between ranting and raving about teh geighs and a burning desire for a little same-sex sexing yourself. And science—science!—backs me and Jane up on this: studies have found that homophobic men are "most aroused" by gay porn. You can suck on that for now, Tim.