Tillman the Skateboarding Dog (I repeat: SKATEBOARDING DOG!!!!) comes to Portland tomorrow. That is correct: This skateboarding bulldog—"the world's fastest skateboarding dog" according to the press release—will be in your city tomorrow. Call in sick, tell the family you're abandoning them, do WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO, because Tillman the Motherfucking Skateboarding Bulldog will be in town Friday, August 5. Here's where and when he'll be in the area:

Friday, August 5th from NOON to 4:00 PM
Western Pet Supply 6908 SW Beaverton Hillsdale, Portland, OR 97225

Saturday, August 6th from 10:00 AM to 2:00 PM
Guide Dogs for the Blind "Fun Day",
32901 SE Kelso Rd., Boring, Oregon 97007

Sunday, August 7th from NOON to 4:00 PM
Animal House - 358 Warner Milne Rd. #111, Oregon City, OR 97045
Tillman the Skateboarding Dog ALSO knows how to snowboard and surf. I will say that again: Tillman the Skateboarding Dog also knows how to snowboard and surf. (Is any of this getting through to you?) Here's some more footage of Tillman the Skateboarding Dog in action.

You're fucking welcome.