UPDATE: Let's not bury the lead, shall we? The Rose City Rollers beat those pesky babes from Bay Area!! We still have a shot at Championships—tomorrow we take on the Oly Rollers at 7 pm at the Memorial Coliseum. Woot!

Hit the jump for the whole story and the recap of today's games.


Rocky Mountain vs. Sacred City
I hope the stink of Sacred City’s defeat at the hands of Rocky Mountain isn’t getting all over Rose City. It’s a blowout as of halftime with 131-24 in favor of Rocky. But Sacred City is showing a ton of heart, with their fans screaming and yelling at jammer Cash Money’s power jams at the end of the first half. There’s some brief halftime entertainment (AKA the crowd and volunteers heaving and ho-ing to move the track back into position).

This uneven match-up is a serious bummer. Both teams look tired. Sacred City because it’s their second game today and they’re getting drubbed, Rocky Mountain because it’s hard work scoring that many times. Sac fans have even quieted down and we’re just waiting for a merciful end. Aw adorable: rival jammers roller-dancing around the track, hand-in-hand. Mile-high final score: Final Rocky Mountain 278, Sacred City 45. Yeesh.

Rose City Rollers vs. Bay Area Derby Girls
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. It’s time for the game we really care about! Rose City Rollers vs. their arch rivals the Bay Area Derby Girls. Let’s smoosh their faces into the track. Get set, go: We’re on the board with five points due to some hot jamming from RCR’s White Flight. Scald Eagle took a mega head-bashing hit to call off the third jam, bringing the score to 12-0 at five minutes in. The Rose City’s Wheels of Justice are handily holding the lead thus far. Jinx. Spoke too soon: Rose City 29, Bay Area 20. Shitballz, now it’s a two-point bout. Bay Area’s jammers are getting slippery and even the amazing blocking of Mercy can’t stop their jammers. BLAURGH, one-point game: Rose City 33, Bay Area 32. Portland’s White Flight scores five for a little breathing room. Now we have a power jam with Scald Eagle jamming, plus a pack advantage with two BAD girls in jail. Another power jam for Rose City, for some relatively easy scoring ops—although White Flight is getting butt-battered by a posse of Bay Area lassies. Ha! Scald Eagle just decimated the Bay Area jammer in a little jammer-on-jammer violence, which is pretty cool until a few seconds later when the Bay Area jammer gets injured on the track by an epic (illegal) hit from Mercy. This unholy hit gets Mercy expelled from the game. Not good tidings, my friends. Bay Area grand slam. Then another. Sad face. Halftime score: Rose City 71, Bay Area 57.

Going into the second half, we’re immediately faced with BAD scoring to make it a one-point match in our favor. But then out comes our jammer Sully Skullkicker for a well-needed power jam while their jammer takes a time-out in the corner. Twenty mothereffin’ points for us: RCR 95, BAD 71. Still too close for comfort. Blasted. Now it’s a power jam for Bay Area and they’re dancing all over that opportunity, while Scratcher in the Eye cools her jets in the penalty box. It’s an eight-point differential with 19 minutes to go. Wheels of Justice just cleared the century mark, with Bay Area just 10 points behind. It’s games like this where it makes sense that West Region Playoffs’ nickname is Besterns. Just amazing, nerve-wracking action. In a clichéd bit of serendipity, I’ve been sitting on the edge of my seat without realizing it. With a little over three minutes left, it’s Rose City 132, Bay Area 112, yet to see the lead in this game. Holy shiznet, White Flight is on fire this game; she makes it look so easy. Good god, we might win this thing. We’re going into our last jam with a pack advantage and a delicious point lead on the board. Can almost taste this golden victory. Boo-yah!! Rose City’s Wheels of Justice 139, Bay Area Derby Girls 120.

Rat City vs. Denver Roller Dolls
Last game of the evening: Denver takes the lead, right off the whistle. Seattle looks strong though. Dang dawg, Rat City takes the lead 15 minutes into the half with 29-26. With just under two minutes to go Rat City nabs the lead again, 48-47. This is turning out to be an unexpectedly close bout (I sorta thought Denver would skate away with it—I should’ve trusted in the anyone’s-game nature of derby.) Halftime report: Denver 55, Seattle 51.

Second half: Lead change Rat City. Seesaw much? Ready for this? ANOTHER lead change: Denver up by four points. Seattle’s tiny little jammer Kamikaze Kim is taking a beating—nothing like so many hips slamming into you when you’re about four feet tall. Ten minutes to go and you’d need a magic eightball to tell where this game is going to go (currently Rat City 96, Denver 83), but Seattle’s skating strong. This is kinda insane. I think it might come down to a Seattle win, which means it might be a sibling rivalry match on Sunday between Rose City and Rat City for that coveted third ticket to Championships. Da-da-duuuuuuhhhh. With a penalty to their jammer in the last jam of the game, Denver loses the game to Rat City, 139-128. That was fucking fun. So sibling rivalry match-up on Sunday—that’s my prediction.

POSTED 9/23/2011, 4:44 PM

Halfway! So far it's been six hours of roller derby and 808 points scored.

Jet City vs. Tucson
The first two games here at Bridgetown Brawl were so evenly matched that these middle games between the bottom-seed teams and the top-seeded juggernauts seems a little anti-climatic. Everett’s Jet City versus Tucson was close, but Everett definitely had the upper hand in that penalty-plagued duel. The final score was Jet City 167, Tucson Roller Derby 100. No Champs for the Arizona ladies

Sacred City vs. Angel City
The next game was a derby national hall-of-famer. Just really, really intensely close with Sacramento’s Sacred City taking on L.A.’s Angel City Derby Girls. Sac-Town immediately took the lead in a very low-pointage game and kept it ‘til the second half when Angel City took a brief lead with nearly 12 minutes left in the bout—Angel 86, Sacred 85—only to have the tide shift seconds later when Sacred re-took the lead from the ladies from Hollyweird. And that’s when the game became Sacred’s business with a high-point power jam that nailed the victory for Sacramento: Sacred 136, Angel City 111, in a game that was littered with broken roller girl bodies and a concussion to boot.

Oly Rollers vs. Jet City
The double-edged sword of Sacred City’s victory is that their next game is a mere four hours afterward with the stellar Rocky Mountain Rollergirls out of Denver. Oi vey. But before that was another blowout sitch with the polished Oly Rollers from Olympia giving a pounding to Everett’s Jet City. The Jet City girls made a valiant go of it, but Olympia poured figurative beer in their eyes and left ‘em in the derby gutter with a final score of Oly 259, Jet City 55 (yeeouch).

And that brings us halfway through the day, with the following games coming up:

4:30 pm Rocky Mountain vs. Sacred City
6 pm Rose City Rollers (COME ON, LADIES!) vs. dastardly Bay Area Derby Dolls
7 pm Denver Roller Girls vs. Rat City Rollergirls

I have to admit that all this talk of jam and power jam at Memorial Coliseum is really making me crave toast.