TO CHAMPIONSHIPS WE GO! The Rose City Rollers' Wheels of Justice exterminate Rat City outta Seattle to win third place in the 2011 WFTDA West Region Playoffs. Score: Rose City 186, Rat City 134. No more bridesmaid for these roller derby ladies, it's their special effin' day.

Rose City Rollers vs. Rat City

This is the big game and I’m stuck on the MAX like a schlub. I don’t know what’s obstructing the tracks at Lloyd but I need to get to the much more exciting track at Memorial Coliseum. Jeez oh Pete. FINALLY THERE. Ten minutes in, we’re up by six points, Rose City 15, Rat City 9. Only to be quickly followed by some Rat City comeuppance: Rose City 15, Rat City 14. Then quick lead change to Seattle, flippity flop. Rose’s Whitey just got lead jammer, then immediately called it off with Seattle’s Carmen Getsome on her tail—some chicken wings were flapped by Rat City because of the call-off. Rose City’s SoulFearic Acid comes away with a point-earning jam: Rose 33, Rat 23. With 12 minutes to go, it’s a tied bout at 33 points. Then Portland’s Sully gets a power jam handed to her by a major foul by Rat City. That was huge! Thirty points from that delightful jammy jam: Rose 63, Rat 33. Plus we ended that play with a pack advantage. SoulFearic is juking and jiving around Rat City like it ain’t no thing. Rose City blocker Layla Smackdown’s wheels just literally fell off mid-jam. With five minutes to go in the first half, it’s Rose 78, Rat City 44. Portland’s staying sharp, keeping their walls strong and defending this game. Halftime report: Rose City 90, Rat City 53.

Amazing footwork by SoulFearic Acid to start out the second half for nine points for Team Us! Scald Eagle picks up Wheels of Justice some more sweet pointage to bring the match to Rose 108, Rat City 64. There’s a large contingency of Bay Area’s roller girls cheering on Seattle right next to me—it’s called spite, after their loss to Portland on Friday. With 21 minutes in the bout, it’s Rose City 139, Rat City 67. White Flight came bowling into the back of Rat City’s pivot to earn herself some time in the jail box for a back block—which makes this a power jam for Seattle during the next jam, igniting the ire of Seattle’s fans. I’ve got to move away from these Bay Area chicks. Okay, now I’m in home territory surrounded by purple. Rat City jammer ReAnimateHer is grand slamming all over our faces—which is quickly answered by a major foul by her, and a Scald Eagle power jam. As I’d hate to jinx this situation… shh, shh, say it quiet, Courtney (we’re totally going to win this mother, yay). With nine minutes to go it’s Rose City 169, Rat City 93, but Seattle’s making a go of it with 24 points, while Acid cooled it in the cage. Then Rat City smoked our defenses for another four points. Six minutes left, Portland up 171-121. Even so… FINAL GAME: ROSE CITY 186, Rat City 134. Pack your bags, Portland’s going to Denver in November for the 2011 WFTDA Championships! I’m crying purple Wheels of Justice tears!

Okay, I'm gonna take a roller break. Stay tuned for a brief Oly Rollers vs. Rocky Mountain recap later tonight, for the #1 spot in the West Region.

Oly Rollers vs. Rocky Mountain Rollergirls
Olympia’s Oly Rollers take an early lead for this heated game for the #1 spot in the West Region. Eight minutes in, it’s Oly 27, Rocky 6. Olympia looks fantastic—finding holes in Rocky’s defensive walls and exploiting the shit out of them. Rocky’s managed to beat the Oly Rollers only three times before; it would be great to see a fourth on those stats. With 11 minutes to go in the first half, it’s Oly 62, Rocky 27. This is a close ‘un, but Oly’s rolling rocks—with five minutes ‘til halftime they’re up by 30. Rocky Mountain has half the score of Oly at halftime: 82-42.

Oly’s still holding strong with a score of 90-54, six minutes into the second half. Rocky Mountain gets a huge power jam to bring the score to Oly 104, Rocky 82, with only 20 minutes left in this roustabout. The gap is getting ever narrower: Oly 104, Rocky 91. Five minutes later: Oly 117, Rocky still at 91. Ten minutes left: Oly 129, Rocky 96. Ha! Both teams are lying flat on the track so one of the Rocky girls can jump them all—Evel Knievel style. The Olympia team holds 'em off for six more minutes, inching up their score (Oly 129, Rocky 102), but a power jam for Oly with two minutes on the clock is the last straw for the Denver team. Oly for the win. Final: Oly 143, Rocky Mountain 106.

So let's break down the winners for the Playoffs:

#1 Oly Rollers
#2 Rocky Mountain
#3 Rose City Rollers
#4 Rat City Rollergirls
#5 Denver Roller Dolls
#6 Bay Area Derby Girls
#7 Sacred City Derby Girls
#8 Jet City Rollergirls
#9 Angel City Derby Girls
#10 Tucson Roller Derby