Guess what? I just bought one of those plastic light-up outdoor Santas—almost exactly like this one!


Anyway, I'm planning on putting it up on my roof next to the chimney this weekend, so people will look up at it and say, "WHAT THE FUCK??? Is that Santa up on that roof???" It'll be good for a laff.

ANYWAY. I just realized I've never mounted a plastic Santa Claus on a rooftop, and Google is being absolutely no help. That's why I'm turning to the mechanically minded denizens of Blogtown to instruct me on the proper way of putting a plastic Santa on a roof, so that he won't fall off during the slightest breeze. Do I need to make a wooden stand for it or something? How do I keep it level on the pitch of the roof? Do I need to wire it down? HALLLLP!