OMG! This I, Anonymous submission is from someone who lives in... wait for it... VANCOUVER! Ahahahahahaa!!! And not the pretty Vancouver, either! The gross one! Listen...

Yeah, I know...Vancouver. It's that little Podunk north bank town that sorta cramps your eccentric, progressive Portland style. On this side of the Columbia, we are inbred, naive slack-jaws who only stare at the big city lights from afar, mouths agape and hands wanking furiously at each other's dicks with ignorant splendor. We hate recycling, and unless it means burning dirty diapers and old rubber tires in our back yard, we NEVER compost, either. Our cars of choice are simple and reduced to two options: Dodge Caravans or Dodge Durangos, the former being the prime choice for our beautiful, Christian mothers to take their children to various sporting events, and the latter is for throwing miscellaneous game we hunt for fun in the backwoods of our neighborhood.

HAHAHAHAHA! GROSS. Wait. Is this guy being... sarcastic?? Only one way to find out: read the whole thing here in the home of the most beautiful place in the world (not Vancouver), the I, Anonymous Blog!