Last night's episode of Breaking Bad was entitled "Everybody Wins"—but guess what? Everybody did not win. In fact, one person in particular especially did not win, and one could even say he "lost." BIG TIME. Would you like to chitty-chat about this? Then enter the Breaking Bad Chitty-Chat Club (now including SPOILERS) after the jump!

Hmmm... shouldve taken that left turn in Albuquerque.
  • Courtesy AMC
  • "Hmmm... should've taken that left turn in Albuquerque."


Okay, here's what I'm thinking:

1) So Walt's "everybody wins" plan to turn Declan's clan into his meth distribution system turns out to be a "nobody wins" plan, because...

a.) Mike's five million dollars leads to his ruin.
b.) Jessie does NOT want back in the meth-making biz, despite Walt's incessant fluffing.
And c.) Walt just made himself some dangerous new business partners. Soooooo... DUMB "EVERYBODY WINS" PLAN, WALT.

2) Speaking of fluffing Jessie's ego, that used to work back in the old days. But Walt's ego—and his idiotic whistling—blew that plan. And now that Jessie is seemingly out the door, Walt thinks that Ricky Hitler (aka Todd) is a suitable replacement? I mean, I appreciate a guy that takes copious notes, and forestalls payment until he knows what he's doing, but he's RICKY HITLER. And he's got a TARANTULA. I don't wanna work with that guy.

3) Skyler continues to remain annoyingly tight-lipped, but that scene in the car wash is pretty indicative of a volcano that's gonna eventually squirt some serious lava.

4) Here's a question for you: Was Mike an idiot for ignoring the time-honored axiom of "Better call Saul"? For such a careful guy, choosing both Ricky Hitler AND Dan Wachsberger seems like he was playing it a bit more loosey-goosey than previously revealed. Though I'm sure Lawyer Dan's cake pop bribe would've worked if the DEA hadn't been tailing him. Everybody loves cake pops!

5) Oh, and also momentarily suspend your disbelief that Walt just happened to overhear Hank's plans to arrest Mike. I mean, I get it... writing a detailed, twisty-turny script is hard... but C'MON.

6) However, the irony that the always careful Mike was gunned down by fucking idiot Walt—AND that Walt could've gotten the list of nine from Lydia (OUCH!)—was almost a bit too galling for him to bear. That last scene, where Mike is just staring out at the lake—longing for the peace he's wanted for so long, and being interrupted by Walt once again—was a sweet, sweet thing to behold.

7) POOR MIKE! I'm really going to miss him, and what's worse? No potential for a spin-off! WAAAAAAHHHH!

8) Next week's episode is the half-season finale, and it looks like Walt and Lydia are teaming up to go after Mike's nine guys in prison. Is this going to end well? HELL TO THE NO.

9) Do you have opinions? Do you like to voice those opinions in interesting comment threads? Then by all means, don't let me stop you. LET'S CHITTY-CHAT!

Oh, well. Watching a stupid kid swing on a playground all day was boring anyway.
  • "Oh, well. Watching a stupid kid swing on a playground all day was boring anyway."