GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! Work it, work it, put and rehearse it. Hot flavors if you wanna come and burst it. LET'S GO TO PRESS.

Get ready for some annoying traffic problems downtown today as Vice Presidential nominee Paul Ryan rolls into town for a Republican fundraiser at the Governor Hotel. If you're trying to find him, just follow the trail of lies.

If the election is tight, be ready for a poop ton of legal battles—most of which will be caused by the Republicans' unethical idea to limit votes in poor minority neighborhoods by making them produce ID.

Wait... Obama outraised Romney in August?!? I guess he does have a nickel for every fundraising email his campaign sends out.

Obama also gets a big bounce after the conventions, jumping ahead of Romney by five points in the polls. (Thanks, Michelle and Bill! Sucks to be you, Clint and empty chair!)

The Chicago teacher strike is ON, a deal is nowhere in sight, and I suppose quite a number of parents are going crazy right now.

The mayor of Trenton, New Jersey is arrested on charges of corruption. WHAT. In New Jersey can't be.

Crazy Uncle Joe Biden cozies up to a female biker in Ohio—please click over and look at the picture... it's priceless.

Officials in Yemen claim that their forces have killed Said al-Shihri, second in command of al Qaeda (and six other terrorists who had the misfortune of being with him).

In Florida, a truck strikes and kills a police officer in Obama's motorcade.

In a 60 Minutes interview last night, U.S. Navy SEAL Matt Bissonnette describes how he and his teammates killed Osama bin Laden. Unsurprisingly gripping stuff.

Another thing we learned from Bissonette's book? Navy SEALs (also like me) loooove their Ambien!

As often mentioned, I don't give two duck poots about sports (especially college football), but apparently this Oregon State Beavers win over 13th ranked Wisconsin is a BIG DEAL.

In gossip, Gossip Girl Blake Lively and failed Green Lantern Ryan Reynolds are married. OMG YU GUYS OMG!

Now here's what's going on in your neck of the woods: A touch of sprinkles this morning—but don't PANIC! The sun is peeking out as we speak and we'll be back to summer by Wednesday.

And finally, here's how this sheep and I feel about Mondays.