Willard Romney's presidential campaign is surprisingly low on cash. Proving how little his own party really actually likes him, Republicans have been way more comfortable cutting checks to the national GOP committee than to the candidate himself. And now Willard has to beg for money right at the same time President Obama's own fundraising operation finally starts taking off.
Paul Ryan, Willard's would-be VP, will stand in front of a room of elderly people and personally tell them why his party wants to consign them to cat food, the pervasive stench of urine, and an undignified death.
Meanwhile, America's least-educated white people are now expected to die much sooner than their counterparts from a generation ago, a sad reversal on decades of life-extending progress and possibly a secret part of the conservative master plan linking the denial of opportunity to long-dreamed cutbacks in government "entitlements."
Rage over that hackneyed anti-Islam video refuses to cool down. In Pakistan, 19 people died after violence erupted on a day of state-sanctioned protests all around the country.
Israel's prime minister, Benjamin Netanyahu, takes time from plotting war against Iran to pretend he secretly isn't thrilled that his visage appeared, without his authorization, in an anti-Obama attack ad in Florida.
Pacifist 20th-century Japan is lurching rightward to combat the threat of a rising and more bellicose China.
Also, everyone should totally read this (slightly hagiographic) story about Barack Obama's own gradually toughened tone against the Chinese.
We know we're torn apart by an historically fat wealth gap when fancy restaurants manage to do well but fat-and-starch shovelers Olive Garden and Red Lobster start doing shittily.
Here's a terrible idea: A Georgia gun range just got its liquor license. I refuse to read any of their protestations on how that will be "safe."
Vladimir Putin, formerly adored by Russians because of his macho stunts, is now just an openly mocked, increasingly unpopular cartoon character.
Look! The product of inhumane working conditions! (And yet I can't look away. I'm scum.)
I'M SO TIRED OF FREELOADERS AND STEW-BUMS WRECKING THIS FINE AND GRAND COUNTRY. I CAN SMELL THEM FROM HERE.