Alex just posted something that gave me a great idea on how to spend my retirement. Since all of you are so deathly afraid of robots—and well you should be—I'm going to go around murdering them for pay. Like this guy.


I dig Magnus, Robot Fighter's steez for a few reasons:

1) His first name sounds like a condom.

2) He goes to work every day in tight short pants—not unlike myself.

And 3) He fucking karate chops the heads off robots when they get too uppity. From Wikipedia:

Magnus was raised by a robot known as 1A...
1A trained Magnus as a warrior to protect humans against both rogue robots, and humans who used normal robots for evil purposes. Magnus was trained from infancy by 1A in an under-sea domed house, using advanced techniques, to become a skilled martial artist who could break steel with his bare hands.

Since this is pretty close to my own life story, I'd say being a short pants-wearing robot murderer—let's not kid ourselves, he's not "fighting" them, he's "murdering" them—is the perfect post-Mercury career for me. As long as it's "ethical," right? That's where you come in: