As a rule, the world is disappointing compared to what movies made me believe would exist. But reading the news the past couple week, I feel like people have been going out of their way to show me reality is at least as good as action films.

Brussels Diamond Heist

Masked gunman drive in through tight security with military precision, steal millions worth of diamonds, and leave without hurting anybody. The target was perfectly selected (it's hard to feel bad for the diamond industry) and the execution was flawless. It's tough to get 8 people to order pizza without killing each other, so pulling off something like this blows my mind.

I can only hope Benicio Del Toro didn't get hurt transporting the stolen diamonds.

Boston Art Heist
23 years after the greatest art heist of all time, the FBI announced they know who did it but it's too late to do anything about it. For crimes like this (brazen, nobody was injured), I feel like it's a game and the thieves won. If you can elude police past the statute of limitations, you deserve it.

I can only hope Pierce Brosnan is having great sex on an island somewhere to a Nina Simone song.

Helicopter Prison Escape
In Canada of all places, a helicopter landed on a prison roof and lowered a rope to the yard where two men grabbed it and rode it away to freedom. That's the most amazing thing I've ever heard. Even better, within 24 hours, everybody was in police custody and nobody was hurt. The cops won this one despite having to do it on horseback (I assume). It's a great story.

I can only hope Ice Cube wasn't too angry that the helicopter was two minutes late, because that guy can get pretty sassy when he's driving tanks.