GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! I will take you around the 'hood on a gangsta lean, 'cause we can (pump, pump) any time of day it's all good for me. LET'S GO TO PRESS.

The uncle of Boston bombing suspect Tamerlan Tsarnaev says his nephew was brainwashed by a friend in Cambridge.

Or maybe boxing was the cause of Tsarnaev's mental state—in that he was punched in the head too many times? SHEESH, let's take a big stretch, why don't we?

Tsarnaev allegedly got the gunpowder for his bombs by purchasing $400 worth of fireworks from a New Hampshire store. Uh-oh... unless the NRA has a stake in fireworks, say goodbye to your bottle rockets!

Charges have been dropped again Elvis impersonator Paul Kevin Curtis who was suspected in the ricin letter attack agains President Obama—and now authorities have identified a second subject. (In a hilarious sidenote, when Curtis was asked by investigators if he had any ricin, he answered, "I don't even eat rice."

A 5.6 magnitude quake rocks Afghanistan injuring more than 100, and killing nine.

A factory building in Bangladesh collapses, killing 80.

A spring flood is wreaking havoc in the upper midwest and deep south, with the Mississippi river peaking at 11 feet above flood stage.

And now news that sent Erik Henriksen into a panic: Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson had emergency surgery—for his hernia. According to The Rock, doctors "had to push my intestines back thru the tear in my abdomen. Kinda romantic." When he puts it that way, it is!

People magazine has named Gwyneth Paltrow the "World's Most Beautiful Woman." Oh, hell no.

Now here's what's going on in your neck of the woods: Sun, glorious sun with highs in the mid-70s—until Saturday. Enjoy it while you got it!

And finally, the hilarious Will Sasso does his best Arnold Schwarzenegger impersonation while driving around the city. More of these, please!