We're always looking for new ways to update the Mercury and its many public-pleasing features. Recently we decided to hire a media consultant company to write and direct a video "theme song" for our very popular daily blog feature, "Good Morning, News!" We insisted that the intro must have "drive, excitement, and a sense of urgency" that reflects the seriousness of the day's world events. After paying $20,000 for the intro, we were disappointed to discover the media consultant company was actually a grifter by the name of "Cheats McScamartist" (should've been more suspicious of that name) who skipped the country with our money.

On the upside, we found this on the internet, which is a better opening theme anyway. SO! Introducing our newest opening theme to... GOOD MORNING, NEWS!