In a strange twist, a Pakistani court has accused former military leader Pervez Musharraf of murder, calling him complicit in the 2007 assassination of Benazir Bhutto. Prosecutors haven't explained, though, how exactly they believe Musharraf committed the act. The former leader returned to Pakistan from exile earlier this year, and has been awash in legal troubles since.

Prolific crime novelist and proud Michigander Elmore Leonard died this morning at 87. He wrote almost 60 novels (to say nothing of his screenplays and short stories) according to Wikipedia's count, and famously admonished aspiring writers to "try to leave out the part readers tend to skip". My favorite Leonard novel? The Hot Kid. That Carl Webster's as cold as ice!

Ready for an outraged discussion about crumbling moral fiber (and violent insanity) in our youth? I don't watch cable news, but I bet if you turn to it any time in the next 48 hours you'll get just that. And maybe it's warranted in this instance: Three Oklahoma teens murdered a jogger yesterday out of boredom, police say.

Obligatory inclusion of the still-devolving situation in Egypt. (Seriously, though, it's a pretty depressing scenario.)

Remember a couple weeks ago, when everyone was yelling shrilly about kidnapped 16-year-old Californian Hannah Anderson? And how FBI agents killed her kidnapper in the wilds of Idaho? That guy—that same alleged murderer—named Anderson's grandmother as the sole beneficiary of a life insurance policy. $112,000.

NEW WHITE HOUSE DOG. I wouldn't care, but she's from Michigan.

When accused Boston Marathon bomber Dzhokhar Tsarnaev limply gave in to swarming agents from his small boat fortress in April? He'd been shot in the face.

The British government's got some explaining to do, after detaining Glenn Greenwald's partner on supposed terrorism suspicions.

Also, British intelligence officials at one point stormed into the the Guardian newspaper's offices to destroy computers containing material from the Edward Snowden leaks.

By far the stupidest thing I've come across this morning (well, obviously besides a murder carried out because of boredom)? Maria Sharapova is apparently scheming to temporarily change her last name to "Sugarpova" as part of a marketing stunt. Just terrible.

Summer's waning, y'all. CHERISH IT.


Finally, slow "Jolene" will change things for you.