I never thought about it until this moment, but to my knowledge there has never been a song dedicated solely to Chinese food. The unfortunate part? Chinese food doesn't get to choose who sings a song about it. The Ark Music Factory—best known for producing music videos for extremely rich children who would never be allowed anywhere near the legitimate music industry ever (see Rebecca Black's "Friday" for the most competent example)—has produced another winner (?) with Alison Gold's tribute to Chinese food called, "Chinese Food." Apparently SHE REALLY, REALLY LIKES IT. (And so does the rapper in the panda suit that flies away on a rainbow.) You may be tempted to stop watching after 30 seconds, but don't stop. Like "Friday," "Chinese Food" eventually digs into your brain and "Chow muh-muh-muh-muh mein!"