As everyone focuses on poor Jimmy Fallon as he prepares to take over The Tonight Show... wait, I need to pause for a second and explain why I called him "poor" Jimmy Fallon. It's because he's FUCKED. The Tonight Show is cursed and the place where innovative comedy goes to die. It's the late show for unimaginative Red State people who can only relate to dull-ass jokes that Jay Leno specializes in. That's why Conan failed, and that is why Jimmy Fallon will fail—even though he is very good at what he does, and it will break my heart to see him fall on his face. I wish him luck... but he needs a lot more than that, and so? POOR JIMMY FALLON.

That being said, let's what the late night King of the Remote Sketch, Conan O'Brien, as he hilariously grills and tortures his staff of interns. He's right where he belongs. (Let's stop making The Tonight Show the pinnacle of late night, when it's the opposite.)