Ah, the hubris of planning for Bridgetown Comedy Fest. As we often say here at the Merc, the fest is best when wandering between the different venues in a laugh-crazed drunken stupor, sampling comedy from the hundreds of stand-ups. As long as you have a weekend pass, it's the bee's knees way to go about it. But what am I if not a foolish fooly fool who's gonna plan anyway, so here's my itinerary for the next four days:

The Dead Author's Podcast starring Paul F Tompkins, with guest Jon Daly (Bossanova, 8 pm). Did you read our article this week? In this podcast, Tompkins is time-traveler HG Wells who interviews different dead authors, played by awesome comedians. I'm guessing Jon Daly will be Charles Bukowski. (UPDATE: Nope! Oscar Wilde!) But I have a bad feeling about this show—like I'm not going to be able to get in to see Tompkins' only Bridgetown appearance. If this plan fails, I'm hanging around the Eagles Lodge all night with its cheap drinks, delightful ambiance, and a butt-ton of comedians I want to see (Aparna Nancherla! Jesse Elias! Lots of folks I haven't seen yet!)

I wanna check out Jonah Ray and Kumail Nanjiani's Meltdown show (Bossanova, 8 pm), because everyone has such glowing things to say about 'em. I want to glow too. Since I'll be heading back to my 'hood later, I'll probably pop my head into the Alhambra's lounge to look in on the local Spicy News show (10 pm)—because I bet their shtick of making comics eat peppers and read the news is pretty awesome live. Then I'm headed to the main room of the Alhambra Hawthorne Theatre for Tony Sam's Persona show (11 pm). I had such a good time with it last time I saw it. I like character-driven comedy and this has it in spades. And with headliner James Adomian doing some wild and crazy bizness, it's bound to blow the roof off the joint.

I need to see Emo Philips, guys! How come nobody told me about him back in the day? He's a master of finely crafted jokes and he's odder than duck at the North Pole. So, I'm fitting in a Doug Fir show at 8 pm. My only other shot of seeing him is on Sunday at 10 pm at the Bossanova. Later on Saturday night... I'm a big fan of Competitive Erotic Fan Fiction—the first time I saw it was two years ago on the closing night at the Eagles Lodge, and it was amazeballs! This time out it's at the Alhambra Theater (10 pm). With delightfully dirty perverts Ian Karmel, Aparna Nancherla, Jon Daly, and Anthony Lopez telling erotic stories about shows like Gilligan's Island and the Teletubbies, what's not to love?

Oh boy, who's tired yet? NOT THIS GAL! I'd like to start out at the All Jane No Dick show at the Hawthorne Theatre Lounge (7 pm). It's the second of their showcases for the fest and it has Kyle Mizono and that girl's unusual. I like that. I'm also checking out beardo weirdo Emmett Montgomery's Weird and Awesome show (8 pm) at the Eagles Lodge. He's awkward and funny and I like his strange. To top 'er off, I'm going to wash the night down with a little open mic action at the Tanker. Because that's a good way to end the best weekend of the year... buzzed and laughing.