I'm bi but there are many words that could describe my sexual/identity fluidity. I like romance with guys (though I have had romances with women too), I like sex with women and men, I like porn of all types—and I generally think sex is personal and that folks should do whatever they like while being respectful. I am female but I get turned on by many types of porn. Why is it that men love F2F porn but only gay/bi guys are supposed to be turned on by M2M porn? M2M porn turns me on even though I know I will never be in a M2M situation. (But I have pegged some dudes, if it matters.) Whats with the stereotypes? Wouldn't we all be better off if we could forsake what is MALE and what is FEMALE and enjoy EVERYTHING?

Thoughts?

For All People

I hate to be the one to break this to you, FAP, but your ability to appreciate all forms of pornography isn't evidence that you're more highly evolved than the rest of us poor motherfuckers or that you've forsaken or seen through or outgrown or escaped MALE and FEMALE.

So what's up with you?

You can't have M2M sex, that's true, but let's take a second to think about why you might enjoy M2M porn. Thinking... thinking... GOT IT: you're a bi woman and you're attracted to guys. You're into guys and there are guys in M2M porn so M2M porn works for you because there are guys in it and you're into guys. Make sense? F2F porn works for you because you're attracted to women and M2F porn works for you because you're attracted to men and women. Whatever kind of porn is available, whatever you pull up on XTube, there's something/someone in it for you.

Straight guys, on the other hand, generally don't enjoy M2M porn because... thinking... straight guys aren't attracted to other guys. There's nothing in gay porn for them. Likewise, most gay men aren't into F2F porn because there's nothing in F2F porn for us. And while some gay men enjoy straight porn, APFAP, it's not because these gay guys are into M2F sex. Gay guys who watch straight porn almost always focus/perv on the guys, projecting themselves into the action and the girls out of it. ("I predominantly watch straight porn," Raziel Reid wrote at the Daily Xtra, "imagining I’m the lucky bitch." Ironically the piece is about the small handful of straight guys—or straight-identified guys—who actually do watch M2M porn.)

Lesbians screw up my neat and orderly porn universe, as there are tons of lesbians out there who watch M2M porn. Some of these M2M-porn-watching lesbians have called into my podcast to explain that since most F2F porn is terrible (fake lesbians having fake lesbian sex for straight male viewers) they watch gay porn instead because the guys aren't fake and they're really fucking and they're obviously into it. Two things: a lot of the guys in gay porn aren't into and are faking. And if the converse were true—if M2M porn was terrible and F2F porn was amazing—I wouldn't watch F2F porn instead. So... something else is at play, I'm thinking, with lesbians who watch gay porn, even if I'm not sure what.

Summing up, FAP, you're attracted to men and you're attracted to women and so you like all kinds of porn. You haven't forsaken male and female—you're into both male and female. And that's fine, that's great, it's not fine to fault people who are incapable of enjoying all forms of porn the same way you do. You're essentially saying, "There's something wrong with people who who aren't just like me and don't do sex and gender the same way I do it." It's not okay when straight people say shit like that, FAP, because it's not... what? It's not respectful.