Dear Portland,
I'd like to take the opportunity to apologize for complaining constantly and in public about how amazing this town "used to be". It's completely unfair and unwarranted. Maybe there's a part of me that wants to convince anyone who will listen that I am secretly a super awesome and hip guy (when in actuality it will, at most, point out that I used to be hip and no longer am). It's been a pleasure and a privilege watching you grow and change (equally for good and ill). I've recently realized that there is ALWAYS someone who has been here longer than you, and they'll ALWAYS claim it was better before you got here.