Dear Girl in My House


Some-one is in love. You should hit her on the shoulder shriek; run into your room and fall on your bed. Now while this is happening shriek and pull your hair up, up in the sky and slowly start to remove those super stylish clothes, starting with your socks. Now once you have removed all of your clothing and are rolling like a ball with your hands behind your knees, let her know how you feel. Things will change immediately.
You could try peeing on her stuff.
... or peeing on her. That'll do the trick.
stop flushing. it works
Just wait till you're diligently emptying the bathroom trash can and a bloody pad falls out.

(yes, this happened to me in college...they're married now, so congrats to them....gross)