Yes. We get it. It's finally June, and thus clothes come off. You with your perfect abs and permabronzed skin mark a stark contrast with the rest of us overwintered, over-beered Portlanders.

Boy, how I wish I had the 4 hours a day I could dedicate to sculpting a perfect washboard stomach, to-die-for shoulder definition, and a perfectly shaved chest that make women swoon and men pop jealousy boners.

You win, hot guy. Bravo.

Now pay your rent like the rest of us flappy, pale, underpaid stiffs.