Americans are disgustingly fat. I’m allowed to say so because not long ago, I was disgustingly fat.
Three years ago, I weighed close to 300 pounds. I would like to tell you being a big, lazy slob was awful, but it wasn’t. I enjoyed massive portions of rich, delicious foods and took great pleasure in passively watching the shiny flat-screen TV in front of my leather couch. It was not such a terrible life.

It was also incredibly selfish.

Things changed for me when I fell in love with a girl who wasn’t fat. She’s a nurse, and she explained the many reasons I needed to lose weight. So I did. It wasn’t that hard, really. I restricted my calories and got some casual exercise. It took eight months to drop 100 pounds. I’ve slowly taken off another 10 pounds or so since. I did not set foot in a gym or eat any weird berries; I adhered to a common-sense diet that fit my lifestyle.

I want you to see this fat person. You are gross and you are not a victim. You decide what you want to look like . End of story.