Richard Heathcote / Staff / Getty Images Sports

The US Women’s National Team defeated France 2-1 for a quarterfinal thriller in the Women’s World Cup on Friday! SEE YOU IN THE SEMI-FINALS SUCKERS!

The match was totally sold out and one of the most highly anticipated matches in Women’s World Cup history. Tickets in the rafters of the Parc des Princes Stadium in Paris were selling for about $180 a seat and on Thursday seats were going for up to $2,100! HUNDRED DOLLA BILLS (EUROS), Y’ALL!

Portland fans can be pretty torn watching France play—Le star and femme capitaine of the French team is former Thorn halfback favorite, Amandine Henry. The kind of player you want on your team and hate to play against. Skillful, patient, composed, and ALL OUT DETERMINED.

This was the fifth game in 18 nights for the US in France and USWNT coach Jill Ellis started the same 11 that crunched Spain 2-1 on Monday. IF IT AIN’T BROKE, DON’T FIX IT.

The US has scored in the first 12 minutes in all previous World Cup matches this year, and on Friday, US forward Megan Rapinoe rolled out her FOURTH 2019 World Cup goal with a free kick drawn after a French foul. US forward Alex Morgan was pulled to the ground as she drove towards the goal and when Rapinoe set her foot on that free kick, she sent it low and undetected right past the French goalie. WAKEY WAKEY, EGGS AND BAKEY!

The entire first half was intense. The US maintained control and their defense proved itself outstanding once again. France did not register one shot on goal the entire first half, but fans and players alike never lost focus, knowing that this game was going to be a long, hard-fought battle.

The US started the second half with a few bangers by Samantha Mewis and Tobin Heath from close range. The French keeper had some sweet saves and the ball soon turned down the field. TIME FOR THE US DEFENSE TO GO TO WORK!

France created chaos in front of US goal keeper Alyssa Nayar's line and nearly nailed one in, but Crystal Dunn and the rest of the D- Line cleared the table and continued to shoo the squad upfield. Let me be clear, this game could not have been won without CRYSTAL GETTING THIS SHIT DUNN. Without her 90-plus minute beast mode, this game would be have been taken by the French.

In the 65th minute of play, the US drove several players up the field at breakneck speeds. Tobin Heath was floated a perfect ball from downfield then sent it across, past Morgan and to the TOTALLY CLEAR AND FREE FEET OF MEGAN RAPINOE FOR A SECOND GOAL!

This was Rapinoe’s FIFTH goal of the tournament. She is now tied with Alex Morgan for the most goals, not just for the US team, but for the entire tourney. STRONG, POWERFUL, TEAM PLAYING WOMEN!

Soon thereafter Tobin Heath had a goal that was quickly retracted for being offside. It was a total bummer to see a second goal taken from her this tournament. (She had one against Sweden, but the officials determined it was an own goal by Sweden since it was VAGUELY deflected off a player's foot. WHATEVER!)

France got a S-P-I-R-I-T injection in the 81st minute when Renard headed the ball into the net when no one was covering her during a free kick. WHAT HAPPENED HERE? SHE'S ONLY THE BEST PLAYER ON THE FRENCH TEAM!

Wendie Renard is like 100 feet tall and has been scoring up and down the tournament! My jaw was on the floor and I went into full-on back sweat PDX panic mode. Good God! Don’t let them get another goal! I’ve been in the bathroom watching the game on my phone for over 90 minutes at work—people are going to start to wonder what I’m doing in here!

The final whistle blew and we all took a long hard sigh of relief and celebrated for a moment. Sure, the US has ANOTHER tough match ahead of them against England on Tuesday, but this win was hard-fought and well-deserved on many levels.

GET ON BOARD! If you don’t have the World Cup Fever, go to the bathroom at work at noon on Tuesday and find out what all the hype is about. There's bound to be some soccer-loving folks in there sneaking a few peeks at the action. You never know who’s got the fever!