I Think I Might Have Signed Up for A Juice Cult


My dad signed up for a juice cult. It tasted like a watered down version of rasberry and strawberry preserves. Seedy, pulpy, and kinda weird.

It was called Xango I think. He was paying like $120 a case and giving them away to friends like a fiend. I think I have 4 expired cases left somewhere...

I tried to dump them on craigslist but kept getting flagged.

Also, I tried the crap for a couple months, all it did was make me hate it. It kind of tastes like burning.
I tried Xango once while staying at a friend's place on tour in Minneapolis in 2004. I thought it was delicious, and think of it occasionally to this day. Mangosteen juice, dude. Mangosteen!
This is a free country..People believe what they want to believe! This is an AWESOME company and a Awesome product...And it is the #1 NetWork Marketing product at this time...MonaVie..You want to learn what it can do for you financially and physically...Please learn here...http://www.mymonavie.com/LoriRoss
As a legitimate river-spanning structure sales representative, I am dismayed at the damage our industry has taken on account of people sarcastically using the phrase "I've got a bridge to sell you." It's true that the bridge-selling has had it's share of charlatans in the past, but in recent years we've made great strides to ensure that the current industry is based on honesty and customer satisfaction.

After all, I'm not looking to sell you a bridge today. I want to keep selling you bridges for the rest of your life! If my customers were dissatisfied, would I have testimonials like this:

"Randy sold me on a Ross Island Bridge BridgeShare product, and my spouse and I couldn't be happier! Two weeks out of the year, that bridge is ours, and we also get special discounts at the 24 hotcake house! Thanks Randy!

Emma V.
Lake Oswego"

Unfortunately, due to the overwhelming response to our marketing promotion, I'm currently unable to leave contact information. Potential clients will be recruited at bus stops and city parks across the Portland metro area.
It's hilarious that even the slightest mention of an MLM scam product immediately draws the sleazy resellers with their "#1 NetWork Marketing product". Sounds like the real deal to me-- you know, curing cancer like HerbaLife and improving your gas mileage like those stupid pour-in additives.

It's sad that otherwise rational people get roped in to standing around doling out samples at the waterfront-- though I imagine the delusional belief in the product's benefits eventually give way to good ol' greed. Rope 'em in and reap the rewards...
My sister works at the MonaVie executive office compound, just outside of Groom Lake, NV. The branch to which she is assigned (tsunami group) is responsible for company PR, strategic growth and internal security. I haven't seen my sister in over three years & I'm pretty sure she spends all her salary on MonaVie.