Did you watch this enormously long piece of shit, beginning to end...WWOOOOOOOWWWW...I am getting anxiety listening to it while writing this 4 minutes into it...wooooooooooow.

I demand Mercury TEAM COVERAGE.

This is like bad porn without any of the sex. That just leaves poor dialogue, sweaty actors with crappy makeup and shame. Plenty of shame.

Steve called you "ninja"? But I thought I was the only one he...no, he's not worth it, I'm not, I'm NOT gonna cry!

what are the odds that MC Hammer is the one that gets pelted with bricks this year?

Better have on-site coverage or I'll continue to throw poop and batteries at Merc HQ.

WOW:
Comedians:
Brian Posehn
Harland Williams
Jimmie "JJ" Walker???????????





aaaaaaaaaaaaand Jandek???

This calls for an in-depth article: Four days in the life of a Juggalo at the Gathering. I'd buy the hard-bound edition.

A 27 minute clip about Juggalos? NFW, thank you.

Did I hear the triumphant return of Worst Night Ever?

Why doesn't MFNW have one of these?
(I am only half joking, but I would help...)

Yeah, cute cover. The reality is that you want clicks on your page. Your "journalistic morels" are a fantasy. The news media is owned by 4 companies and orders are handed down from on-high. The infomercial is cheesy to keep-away people that would show up based solely on the line-up. If your the type of person that can't see the joke in it all, you shouldn't be there. Just like I don't go to jazz festivals. I don't shit-talk them like a small-minded prick. I just move on. You're a sad bunch of people. Whoop! WHOOP!!