"the camping trip with Furries event is already sold out"

I'm going to beat Graham to the punch and call shenanigans.

None of the other choices look enticing after imagining Sarah at a furry campout. I'll let the rest of you choose while I go stare at the wall disconsolately for a bit.

meh. try harder next time.

Oh, this would be a much less comfortable Debbie Tay to hang out with, but alas, its not the same one from my childhood:

The Space Lesbian is dead. BY A.J. BENZA, Sunday, May 07, 1995
Debbie Tay, the topless dancer, cable access TV host, perennial Howard Stern guest and former heroin addict was found dead at a friend's Alphabet City apartment last week with 20 open bags of smack and the works by her side, friends said. Tay, who had been off the junk for nearly a year, apparently went back for a little taste one last time. It was one time too many. Like Jimi Hendrix, Jim Morrison and Janis Joplin, Tay checked out at 27.

None of these options are sufficiently horrible to fit the likes of Smirk.

What happened to motocross at Washugal ?

Or camping at Pickathon as a Furry ?

Don't send her to the lingerie party. She writes a sex column and went to Slutwalk. It will only result in yet another "I thought it was going to be douchey but they were all really nice people" columns.

As much as I know she might be into it, I voted for the Tea Party event. Even if it doesn't actually make Smirk suffer, at least the resulting column could be potentially interesting.

I'm voting Eagles. It will actually make a decent story. And I'm not sure I feel comfortable voting to send someone to an underwear party. I'm just not that cruel.

Lame sandwich. Wilamette Week cover stories have more edge. What this stunt has become is the most dissapointing thing The Merc's ever done. For shame.

I worry that Sarah Mirk is already used to ignoring swarms of douchey guys. At the event the pack will ignore her and chase after the kind of girls who like swarms of douchey guys. Her article will be written from the sidelines and contain no startling, novel moments.

Hopefully instead she will use this opportunity to play "Sorority Sister for a Day" and attempt to discover why women would unironically attend this event. I think this could be done respectfully and would yield an interesting perspective from a group that isn't typically represented in the Mercury.

But the Mercury already reports on the Tea Party's happenings! How is that uncomfortable? It's just news.

At this point just send her to Seaside and make her stand in front of the windmill at Ten Tiny Tees in the corn suit with her legs spread for a few hours on a Saturday afternoon.