I'm playing this fun game where I try to come up with worse, more unappealing names than "John Carter" for a space sci-fi action-adventure alien romance.

1. "Shoes"
2. "Beige"
3. ???

It is surprisingly difficult.

I was really hoping that this movie would be good. I blame absolutely everything on taking "of Mars" out of the title.

Elsewhere in the article it mentions that last year's Disney mega-bomb was "Mars Needs Moms," the Berkeley Breathed kids-book adaptation. I think the Red Planet is over for a while. So much for that "Barfly on Mars" pitch I was gonna try.

I thought John Carter was a big screen movie from the TV show ER.

Oh yeah, also this reminds me of when "Waterworld" came out and some wag dubbed it "Fishtar." Good times.

Fishtar, ha! I remember that. I saw Waterworld on opening nite at the old Eastgate Theatre. It was fun.

Yeah, Waterworld *was* enjoyable (floating) garbage. Might make a good choice for Hecklevision.

Carbona - they made this movie in 2009. Traci Lords was in it.