I also cannot stand it when parents let their kids act up in public. And handling expensive merchandise?! That really shouldn't be tolerated.

I do agree that these days parents seem to be scared to discipline their children. Ridiculous.

It never ceases to amaze me the number of self conscious "parents" who are more concerned with appearing to be a good parent than actually being a good parent. Most parents just treat their stupid kid as an accessory/project anyway, so why take these people serious to begin with? Their lives are over, they're doomed to domesticity so it's not that surprising they delude themselves into thinking they can rationalize with a toddler the same way one would rationalize with a 30 year old.

I have two well behaved little kids, only because the parenting started at home. They know that I'm boss and if they do some how get a little loud in a coffee shop, they know when mom says " sit down, safety hands" they know that mom means they sit down, shut up, and lace there fingers together. If not then they get one verbal warning of a time out at home. If that doesn't work then its a light spank in the restroom. It never has to come to a spank. They just do it, with no bribe but a hug and I love you. I think if parents get off the couch at home and parent then taking kids in the public is not a problem.

I have no qualms about yelling at another person's child. Even better, I point out that child's action to my child and tell him, that is not acceptable behavior and you will be receiving some negative attention. I have had parents tell me that I need to act like an adult and not yell at their child. My usual response is that they need to get a F'n clue.

I agree. I was at a nice brunch place on Belmont a few months ago and this woman's toddler was seated about 3 feet away from me on the bench seats. The child crawled under the table, kicked me twice, and knocked over one of our drinks and was in general a little shit.

Reprimand? No. Apology? No. Eye-roll yes from the incredibly tattooed mom bitch who you just KNOW was the rich girl in high-school with fancy purses who picked on people (that many tattoos and you either have shitloads of money or are fucking a tattoo artist) and her two terminally bitch-faced cronies.

When our party said something she told us to mind our own business. They didn't charge us for breakfast it was so bad.

Then later we see her getting into her BMW to drive...after she'd had 3 Bloody Marys...stellar parenting.

And that's just a random example. I'm keeping my mouth shut on my friends with kids. ALSO: I think anti-vaccination parents are fucking morons. Whooping Cough is back? IMAGINE THAT.

Now I go drink caffeine.

Well most parents are miserable not only because their life prospects were so dismal that having a child seemed like the best option but also because you have to be a bit of a control-freak/narcissist to have the desire to control/mould another human. Most parents these days are just grown up kids who assumed having a kid would turn them into adults, please their own parents, etc. Generally speaking, most people who have kids are absolutely terrible egomaniacs who think far too highly of themselves and their parenting abilities despite having notably foul mannered kids. Many of the moms in Portland resemble a tattooed/liberal version of Amy Poehler's character (the "hip mom") from Mean Girls.

working on sunday:

I am not expert on parenting, but I AM a parent. I am not under the impression that my child is perfect. He can be a total asshole at times, but only towards myself and his father, which makes sense seeing as how we are the ones who discipline him.

But then there come the moments when I realize that he is practically an angel compared to a lot of other kids. He doesn't take things that aren't his, he doesn't hit, he doesn't scream. He's polite and always asks permission.

Being a parent is indeed a complex and difficult role, but you know what? It's not hard to teach your kid to be respectful and well behaved.

I never wanted kids, still suffer from post part em depression, still strongly dislike kids in general. But the difference between my kid and other kids who never seem to be disciplined is incredibly obvious. Actions speak louder than words. And so many parents these days are too lazy to really think about how the things they do are going to shape their little ones' personalities.

And with posts like these, don't take them so personally. They aren't specifically about you (unless you happen to be one of the aforementioned lazy parents). I did not translate this post as an attack on my parenting methods because I am decently confident that I am doing right by my child, and the way he acts in comparison to some others only reinforces my confidence. And I agree that lazy parents who don't discipline their children end up raising spoiled assholes.

So. Jesus. I have had a lot of coffee today.

Oh, and the only reason I mention post part em depression and a general dislike towards kids is to prove the point that if I can create a child that never acts in that ridiculous way, it really ain't that hard.

Montessori kids are the worst. But still, confront the parents you idiot.

Hey so, generally curious because I don't know any and my kid is only three so we haven't started the school thing yet.

What makes Montessori kids annoying? Are they basically just self entitled little shits?

I know two adults who went to Charter schools and I adore both of them. However one grew up in the south and the other in Arizona. Don't know if that has anything to do with it, seeing as how they aren't Portland kids.

Montessori are all about 'not saying no' and exactly what they op described. They're not supposed to experience any negative reinforcement. So a kid goes to stab an outlet with a fork and they say 'that's not for you.' And they ask how they feel about things. It's supposed to be ~deprogramming~

Kay_b, you have now typed out "post part em" twice which means that's what you think that word is. Maybe you have oldtimer's disease. lulz

True. Must add "postpartum" to my auto correct dictionary.

Rich: Shut the hell up. Spelling mistakes happen to everyone. And I do not revel in my emotional issues. I don't go around the far ends on the internet to research conditions. I admit to them, I deal with them. End of story. But I hope you have fun making a fool of yourself by unnecessarily being an asshole.

ANY adult yelling at a kid (in anger) isn't OK. Raise your voice to get their attention, OK...An adult should act like one, I don't care how you were raised, or if you turned out "OK" and your parents rubbed salt in your eyes for looking at dirty magazines...Parenting is hard, and anyone with the time to do t even half well deserves some respect, but not here apparently. True, talking to a toddler like they are a genius is BS.

I know, that comment meant that I really don't care about the fact that my depression is "postpartum", so no, I never learned how to spell it. In my actual life I tend to deny to myself that there is any issue going on until it's eventually too difficult to ignore.

HEALTHY!

Yeah, it's so much better when parents just slap the toddler, tell it to shut up if it asks a question, and parent by the "because I said so" method.

That really produces considerate, well-behaved kids (and future adults).

Sure, there are extremes on both sides, but I'd always prefer to see a parent talking to/reasoning with a child over one yelling at and/or beating it.

JMHO as a parent and a former child development professional.

Oh, and BTW, Montessori kids are among the MOST disciplined out there. The method was created to provide discipline, structure, and instill personal responsibility and consideration for others in children lacking such order in their lives.

I was observing in a Montessori school back in college, and suddenly, all the kids started putting their materials (and they are provided REAL materials, such as glass and ceramic dishes and actual tools/instruments, not "toys") away and assembling in a circle for group time; I hadn't even heard the small bell which the teacher rang to signal the transistion!

In fact, I sort of found the whole system a bit creepy and OVERLY structured, esp. since it was created for impoverished, war-torn kids and today is most commonly used with upper-class kids whose lives tend to be highly structured.

Wow Raven. NO ONE is saying that yelling and hitting is what is necessary to discipline a child. But when you tell a two year old "You hit me in the face, and I am upset, so you are going to bed." in the same sweet voice you use to tell them everything else, then they have no idea that what they did was wrong.

I don't yell at my child, but I have a stern voice/tone that let's him know he's in trouble, and he is told why he is in trouble. The majority of what the people in this conversation are saying is that these specific kids they are talking about are not disciplined at all, and that is not good. Not "YOU NEED TO BEAT SOME SENSE INTO YOUR KID!"

Sheeesh.