Comments

1
I'm so microwaving my leftover fish for lunch today. It is cube life and it sucks. Stop being a pussy and suck it up.
2
hey cheesedick, get over it. office life is a microcosm of everyday life. that includes, getting cropdusted by co-workers, people making slurping sounds when they eat the indian food they just nuked (that's now stinking up the entire office), people picking their earwax with ballpoint pens, etc.

at least you have a job. now get back to work.
3
Oh man, I fucking hate when people clip their nails in public. I saw/heard a woman doing it on the bus the other day. It's so trashy and disgusting...
4
Apparently you like waking up earlier in the morning than I do. I make my breakfast at work every day to save myself the extra 30 minutes it would take to make and eat it at home. That's 30 minutes more sleeping in for my tired ass. Work smarter, not harder dipshit and try practicing some tolerance. At least you don't have some hot headed boss micro-managing your every move and screaming at you for the most minute of mistakes.
5
Not just one, but two nail clippers? (I fucking hate you guys)

Not to take this rant away from you, but I may have you slightly beat, maybe I,A. Ex-employee would simultaneously clipped his nails to the infamous Wham Christmas song “Last Christmas,” last Christmas. I hid his fucking clippers, for the remaining part of the year, but damn the dollar tree for replacing them!

“Cliiiip, clipclip. (Last Christmas)
Clip. clip. clip clip clip. (I gave you my heart)
Clip clip clip clip clip, clip clip clip clip (But the very next day you gave it away)
Cliiippppp clip, (This year)
Clip clip clip clip clip (To save me from tears)
Clip clip clip clip clip clipppp” (I'll give it to someone special)

I’ve also heard the clipping rendition of Limp Bizkit “Nookie”

STOP FUCKING DOING THAT!
6
Welcome to adulthood.
7
Wah! You have an easier job than many and you are crying about working indoors 9-5? Everything bothers you apparently. Boom. Outta here, ya fucking whiner
8
It's called work. There is a reason they have to pay us to do it.
9
But but but

This is fucking stupid. There are some shitty fucking cube jobs out there, and seriously fucked up co-workers, yet this guy is pissed over nail clippers and breakfast?

Kill yourself, Anon. There is NO place you could go, NO career you could take, to ease your torment. For a simple reason: YOU are the problem. DO IT!
10
Wait, you're whining because you might have to do this for 30 years? My 65 year old coworker retired "early" because she everyone she was friends with were dying off so she figured she better quit now and enjoy maybe 9 years before things got real shit.

So you get to work for 30 more years? Boohoo. That's not very long. Fuck off.
11
It'll all be worth it when you get that first paycheck and can pick up a hooker and score some coke along 82nd.
12
I have the solution I Anon: HEADPHONES
13
Haha, I love the gripe about eating breakfast at work. It definitely doesn't sound like maybe YOU'RE the nitpicky pain in the ass to work with...
14
At least he's not eating boogers for breakfast, and the nail clipping, at least it's not his toes.

This was the job I had/hated in the Seattle dot.com days.
15
If you can't bring yourself to talk to your coworkers about irritating behavior, then you deserve to be irritated. Think of it as the world trying to help you grow a spine.

Sympathy denied.
16
Dude, you need to learn how to get paid to clip your fingernails....
17
You are a whiny little fuck. Suggest rethinking your alleged career (which at this rate will be pretty short-lived) and focusing perhaps on working in shelters, on the reservation, or maybe in the Sudan, so you can put your whingeing in perspective. Also, I guarantee that your coworkers already hate you more than you know because, well ... you're a whiny little fuck.
18
A large number of people in my office microwave their meals. Who's the idiot that cooks breakfast at home instead of taking that extra few minutes to sleep a little more and having a lame excuse to not be working for a few minutes?

But yeah, fuck everyone that clips their nails in public places. I'll forgive the occasional hangnail trimming, but don't go through all your fingers where people are around. That's the first-world problems version of water torture.

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