You can actually say what happened instead of writing in confusing passive-aggressive language. That's the fun part of being anonymous.

We need a workshop on putting a coherent narrative together around here.

The sad part is that I actually understood this. I've been reading too much I,A.

Did somebody actually get stabbed? By a stranger named fuckface? Help.

Learn to write formally before you try to write conversationally.

i wish the mercury could utilize some sort of breathalyzer for I,A submissions, like the type installed in cars for people who have DUIs; the submit button won't work if too much drugs/alcohol is in one's system.

or maybe i wish that people understood that only names and places are supposed to be left out of the submission, not the actual event that occured.

maybe i wish that both happened and we could all enjoy some really juicy anonymous gossip. doesn't anyone fuck other people's spouses anymore? or accidently vomit in a litter boxe at their one night stand's apartment? or get walked in on cross dressing in a fitting room?

portland, apparently, is fucking boring.

I thought a fuck face was a fuck face and the stranger is when you sit on your own hand until it falls asleep and then you punch the clown?

This is my least favorite piece of misuseofthelanguage this week.

The first time I read it, it made no sense except for the homophobia part. The second time, I think I understood what it's saying.

So...what happened? I think a guy called a gay couple the fag word and then he went to use the bathroom, and then...what? I am confused.