Comments

1
I think you channeled this through my vagina crazy! I also would love to bet that the obsession you "have" may have been love once. But, i also bet that the dbag your talking about used all of your own beliefs about love against you to help create the feeling that you're left in rejection with. It takes two people. You're not as crazy as you feel, trust me! And he is a coward for leaving you like this. Is he Married?
2
DEAR UNNAMED GUY: RUN.
3
"What I want is a connection with a guy that we both know won’t last, but that is intensely emotional till it’s over. What I want is hot, passionate sex that belongs in a dirty romance novel."

A guy? No one in specific, just "A GUY" to have passionate sex under the premise that you both understand it won't last? Gee, where are you gonna find a guy a down for hot sex with no commitment?

The problem is you not voicing what you want to the guy(s) you're interested in. If you want to fuck a guy, just come out and say it. 99.9% of the time he'll be game for it.
4
I imagine this was written by some guy who was sort of dating a girl and thought she was totally falling for him because she dropped the 'L' bomb a couple times and he took it way too literally. For example: one night he makes her dinner and she's like "OMG, Justin, gluten free tempeh steaks with kale pudding! My totes faves. I LOVE you!!" But Justin doesn't say 'I love you' back (at least not yet) because he doesn't want her to think he's saying it just because she said it first. After dinner Justin sends his mom a text, "I've found the woman I'm going to make your grandbabies with." To which Justin's mom replies with by knitting up a brigade of baby booties and sending them in the mail as encouragement. Two days later, Justin and his lady friend are watching Love Actually in his living room. Towards the end of the movie he leans in close, brushes the hair from her ear and whispers, "I love you too." Which totally throws off her Candy Crush game. Annoyed, she turns her phone off and looks up for the first time all evening. Across the room, like mistletoe hanging in the doorway, is a pair of baby booties. Justin's lady friend then takes in the rest of the room in slow horror. Framed photos line the wall. Various pictures of weddings, family vacations, delivery rooms with happy couples holding pink babies. Justin's lady friend (let's call her Sarah because at this point we might as well give her a name), Sarah, gets up to examine the photos. She is not mistaken. Each and every picture has her and Justin's faces photo shopped onto it. Trying to play it cool, Sarah fakes some menstrual cramps and walks herself out. Justin follows her to to the street and even tries awkwardly to help her onto her bike like a knight helping a lady onto a horse. She pushes him away and rides off into the evening, pedaling home as fast as she can. The next day she ignores his 78 text messages and he is surprised to find himself blocked from her facebook. He can only surmise that she was just a Crazy Chick Who Wanted To Jump His Bones and wouldn't know real love if it was hanging on the living room wall. Alas, Justin had once again been chewed up and spit out like last weeks kale pudding.
5
Sounds like fun but have you ever actually tried to have sex in a dirty romance novel? They're so small, and the glued binding usually breaks right away, pages scatter everywhere...it's a real mess.
6
ARE YOU TALKING TO ME???
7
No thanks. I only deal with professionals.
8
I'd be willing to train the right, young, amateur, if she's hot.
9
I couldn't figure out the first sentence and stopped reading...
10
Smirk, if I told you once I've told you a million times -NO!!
11
"In Love" is an illusion. Any good psychiatrist will tell you that. It is just a temporary feeling when ego boundaries blur.

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