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Good Morning, Portland. It's supposed to rain today, so be sure to stubbornly refuse to use an umbrella while glaring at Californians. Now here's the news:

Linda Brown, the girl behind the landmark Brown v. Board of Education Supreme Court case, has died.


The FTC is investigating Facebook over the recent NYT article on Cambridge Analytica to determine whether the social media platform failed to protect user privacy. Worst case scenario, Facebook could be facing trillions of dollars in fines. Locally, Attorney General Ellen Rosenblum has joined peers across the country in demanding answers from Facebook.

In the least shocking revelation ever, it turns out Trump is a corrupt politician. Soon after his election, a top fundraiser for the campaign began marketing his connections to Trump and offering access to his clients.

via GIPHY


In other Trump corruption news, Jared Kushner's real estate company allegedly received $500 million in loans after White House meetings with executives from Apollo Global Management and Citigroup. Ugh. If you love following Trumpian corruption schemes as much as I do, check out WNYC's podcast Trump Inc.

The United States has expelled 60 alleged Russian spies following the murder of former Russian spy Sergei Skripal and his daughter in the United Kingdom. The European Union will also expel 31 Russian diplomats. Unsurprisingly, Trump hasn't tweeted about this for fear of upsetting the beloved Putin.


Speaking of things Trump doesn't tweet about, Stormy Daniels has filed a defamation lawsuit against Michael Cohen, Trump's personal lawyer. The suit alleges that Cohen implied she's a liar, and his pants are on fire.

Internationally, we can all look forward to the super democratic election of General el-Sisi in Egypt. It closely mirror's Putin's "democratic" election in that the sitting president is insisting on high voter turnout and sending goons to intimidate potential opponents into dropping out of the race.

Speaking of dictators, it sounds like Kim Jong-un might have slipped across the border—rumor has it he's chilling in China right now.

And in hometown news, Burgerville employees are giving their corporate overlords 48 hours to acknowledge their union before they get the feds involved and force them to. I'm craving that tasty triple berry milkshake, but I'd rather make my own than cross the picket lines.


Local venue the Know is facing staffing issues partially due to inappropriate sharing of employee Social Security numbers, Portland Mercury's Ciara Dolan reports. Some employees are still owed wages and the turmoil could affect scheduled shows at the venue.

In public records news, Mayor Wheeler is facing a lawsuit over secret records regarding the Foster-Powell homeless shelter.

Please enjoy this video of a guy gobbling at turkeys so that they gobble back. Now go kick Tuesday's ass!