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Kim Jong Un yanks the rug from underneath gullible Trump.
Kim Jong Un yanks the rug from underneath gullible Trump. Pool / Getty News Images

GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! Last night was so fun. Lovin' 101. I was holding you so tight. Now I just might make you my wife. LET'S GO TO PRESS.

Hey Portland! ICYMI, you had a primary election last night—and it was a very good night indeed for WOMEN who largely dominated the city's races. Jo Ann Hardesty will face Loretta Smith this fall for city commish, position 2; Susheela Jayapal delivered big time tonight, running away with the Multnomah County Commish seat, district 2;Jennifer McGuirk is hanging on tight in a squeaker race against Scott Learn for Multnomah County Auditor; Deborah Kafoury and Nick Fish will both keep their jobs, and Kate Brown and Knute Buehler will be duking it out for the governor's race this November. Be sure to check out last night's Mercury election live blog for a blow-by-blow account of the evening! And for analysis on what it all means, check out our news lead this week.

Primary elections took place around the country as well, and once again women ruled the day—especially in Pennsylvania. Meanwhile Republican candidates are positioning themselves as Trump clones... so it should be a very interesting November.

In a surprise twist no one would have guessed in a BILLION years, North Korea's Kim Jong Un is threatening to cancel his summit with Trump after seeing US military exercises in South Korea. Oh well, so much for Trump's Nobel prize, I guess.

The Senate Judiciary Committee has released thousands of pages of testimony that shed a lot more light on that murky meeting Donald Trump Jr. had with the Russians before the election.

Gina Haspel, Trump's pick to lead the CIA, has been approved by a Senate panel (thanks to at least one very gullible Democrat).

A suspect in the CIA leaking case that revealed the agency's hacking tools has been arrested—but for something else entirely... possessing child pornography.

Because they are monsters, the Trump administration is moving forward with their plans to split up families who illegally cross the border, and confine the children to military bases.

Trump's sniveling cohort Paul Manafort tried to convince a federal judge that Mueller couldn't investigate him because of the way the special counsel was appointed. HAHAHAHAAAAA! THAT DIDN'T WORK.

Finally, a GOOD headline: A barista refused to serve a man ‘being really racist’ to a Muslim. Her bosses backed her.

Tom Wolfe—author of The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test, Bonfire of the Vanities, and The Right Stuff—has died at the age of 88.

Now what about the WEATHER, you may be wondering: Cloudy with occasional sprinkles and a high of 67.

And finally, DEAR DUMMIES: Before riding your bike into an "abandoned" train tunnel, please check to make sure it's actually "abandoned."