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Hi, Im quitting the Trump administration, and no, that does not make me a good person.
"Hi, I'm quitting the Trump administration, and no, that does not make me a good person." Stephanie Keith / Stringer / Getty News

GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! The very first time that I saw your brown eyes, your lips said "hello" and I said "hi." LET'S GO TO PRESS.

Oregon Republican Rep. Bill Post, in the vein of his evil mentor Donald Trump, posted an absolutely cruel tweet mocking sexual assault survivors. The good news? You can help vote his ass out of office in November.

Speaking of the importance of voting, according to an Oregonian/KGW poll, the gubernatorial race between Kate Brown and Republican Knute Buehler is much closer than it should be.

Comedian Katt Williams—who was arrested this weekend in Portland for allegedly assaulting his town car driver—pleaded not guilty to the charges.

A Vancouver Trump supporter was shocked to discover his truck—which had pro-Trump bumper stickers—was set on fire and destroyed.

UN Ambassador and Trump apologist Nikki Haley is resigning her position—BUT DON'T GET EXCITED about some kind of potential change of heart or sudden discovery of morality where there is none.


Republicans have been desperately searching for a fear-mongering message to sell to voters ahead of the midterms, and they've found it: ANGRY, VIOLENT MOBS OF DEMOCRATS!! (Remember when we were snowflakes?)

There's less than a month left until the midterms, and Democrats continue to slowly gain ground in House elections, and according to this estimation, 68 Republican house seats are in play.

Supreme Court Justice (UGH!!) Brett Kavanaugh takes the bench today and for now will fortunately not be hearing any cases of consequence.

In 2016, Trump co-conspirator Rick Gates pursued methods of manipulating social media from an Israeli company that would favor his candidate.

This NYT opinion piece is encouraging states to abolish the polling place and adopt Oregon's mail-in ballot system in order to "save our democracy."

You don't need any further proof of the deep idiocy of the far right—however, this story about how conservatives are melting down over Taylor Swift voting for Democrats is HEE-LAR-I-OUS!


RELATED: Kanye West is scheduled to dine with his best bud Donald Trump at the White House.

More far right lunacy! A mom tweets out a pic of her Navy vet son, depicting him as refusing to go on dates because he might get falsely accused of rape... except it's all a lie, and the son actually supports the #MeToo movement. STOP IT MOM, YOU'RE EMBARRASSING MEEEEEEE! (The good news? It's produced some AMAZING memes, such as....)


Hurricane Michael—just upgraded to a category two storm—is bearing down on Florida's panhandle.

The UN is asking Turkey and Saudi Arabia to investigate the disappearance and possible murder of Saudi journalist Jamal Khashoggi. Meanwhile investigations are underway in the rape/murder of Bulgarian journalist Victoria Marinova who was reporting on corruption involving European Union funds.

Some Amazon workers are PISSED about their recent wage increase, saying they'll actually be making less money in the long run.

Now let's examine the WEATHER: A new dry spell begins today with partly sunny skies and a high of 67.

And finally: