GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! There is only one for me, you have made that possibility. We can take that step to see if this is really gonna be. LET'S GO TO PRESS.
OKAY: So remember the other day when the Portland Police casually dropped the news that they didn't think it was important for us to know about those Patriot Prayer thugs gathering on a downtown rooftop garage with weapons overlooking an August rally? Now they're saying that it was "only" three rifles in cases, and the officer who discovered them asked the thugs to put the guns away, and never filed a report about it. Think they would've been so nice if antifa protesters were on that rooftop? Or if it had been a political candidate rally? That is some alarming bullshit right there.
Speaking of protests, will Mayor Ted Wheeler's new proposed rules about how, where, and when people demonstrate hold up in court? Our Alex Zielinski talked to the experts.
Nike's Phil Knight, after pumping $1.5 million into GOP gubernatorial candidate Knute Buehler's campaign, has now given another million to the Republican Governors Association—because maybe he wants to squander all the good will Nike got from hiring Colin Kaepernik?
According to a new study, Oregon paramedics give worse care to Black and Asian people than their white patients.
More evidence emerges tying Saudi royalty to the probable murder and dismemberment of journalist Jamal Khashoggi. Meanwhile Donald Trump continues to defend and make excuses for the Saudis, now tying the accusations to his defense of unworthy Supreme Court judge Brett Kavanaugh.
Twitter has published some 10 million tweets from Russia and Iran that shed light on how they meddled in the 2016 election.
A plane carrying Melania Trump and reporters was forced to return to its base after the cabin began to fill with smoke. It landed safely.
It's been revealed that during this past summer over 9,000 deportation cases were dropped after the Supreme Court ruled against them for faulty paperwork.
Canada has bested America again by becoming the first major world economy to legalize recreational cannabis. (Say bye-bye to our tourist dollars!)
Beto O'Rourke got fiery in his final debate with Ted Cruz, picking away at his record and borrowing Trump's nickname for the senator, "Lyin' Ted."
A new lawsuit accuses Facebook of lying to advertisers and falsely inflating the average viewing time of their videos—causing bad things to happen.
If you missed it: today it was confirmed that Facebook massively & knowingly inflated its video-view statistics, which had the DIRECT consequence of 90% of media orgs firing writers in favor of expensive video producers, who also got fired when it turned out video was worthless https://t.co/WqdAUBIe6L
— Chris Conroy (@dyfl) October 17, 2018
Roseanne has returned without weirdo racist Roseanne Barr, and has been renamed The Connors, with an episode about the matriarch dying from an opioid overdose.
Meanwhile weirdo racist Roseanne Barr is not happy about the show's handling of her character, but really: who cares what this weirdo racist thinks?
POOR, POOR SEXUAL PREDATOR:
During a recent standup gig, Louis C.K. joked about his sexual misconduct controversy: “I lost $35 million in an hour” https://t.co/dAkNQhK2B0 pic.twitter.com/aXFTJ4wlLP
— Consequence of Sound (@consequence) October 17, 2018
Now let's look skyward to the WEATHER: Another clear, gorgeous day with a high of 77!
And finally, this mashup of Kendrick Lamar and A-ha's "Take on Me" is a work of goddamn sorcery. BURN THE WITCH!!