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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! And keep talking that mess, that's fine. But could you walk and talk at the same time? LET'S GO TO PRESS.
Let's start with the best news of the day: THE NOOSE IS CLOSING AROUND TRUMP'S NECK. Special Counsel Robert Mueller has publicly identified Trump as a "person of interest" in the Russia probe, and being a central subject on at least two fronts: Clearly lying about his campaign not being in close contact with Wikileaks during the 2016 campaign, and also clearly lying about not making deals with the Kremlin about a Trump Tower he was planning on building in Moscow during the same time. (Hat tips to Trump's former lawyer Michael Cohen for singing like a bird.)
OH, BUT IT GETS JUICIER: According to Buzzfeed News, during the campaign Trump promised to give Vladimir Putin a $50 million penthouse in that planned, but never built Trump Tower in Moscow. It's almost like he was buying off the Russian president to help him in some way!
AND BETTER STILL: Mueller is also looking into Trump's also corrupt children (Hi, Don Jr. and Ivanka!) who allegedly knew about daddy's shady Russian dealings and helped him cover it up.
Yo Bro! Let's murder some journalists! FUCK YA! https://t.co/VACkW31f9W
— Nick Hanauer (@NickHanauer) November 30, 2018
Republican governors are calling out Trump and the GOP, insisting that the party needs to stop catering to extreme right wing nutjobs.
Meanwhile Republicans—like GOP bro Paul Ryan—are insinuating that they got their asses handed to them in California because of a rigged voting system, rather than constantly catering to extreme right wing nutjobs.
It seems that we have a real case of voter fraud happening in North Carolina. Specifically, absentee ballot fraud on the part of the Republicans. It is so egregious one of their own who barely won a Congressional race can’t even get his victory certified. https://t.co/CJ4w5SypuW
— Jamil Smith (@JamilSmith) November 30, 2018
A new rule would limit what federal employees can talk about on the job. Two of the verboten topics: the resistance, and any talk of impeachment. (It's okay, guys! Just hang on until he gets impeached!)
In St. Louis a police officer bragged about beating protesters—except one of the people he mercilessly beat was an undercover cop.
In continuing proof that FACEBOOK IS GARBAGE: Chief Operating Officer Sheryl Sandberg allegedly had her staff "look into" wealthy liberal donator George Soros after he made critical comments about corrupt tech companies (like Facebook).
Huge hotel chain Marriott has admitted they've been the victim of a huge data breach in which the personal information of up to 500 million guests may have been hacked.
IN LOCAL NEWS: The plan to bring a major league baseball stadium to Portland continues its creep forward with renderings of what the complex would look like... including a sky tram? OH THE JOKES WE WILL MAKE.
The Timbers have clinched a spot in the 2018 MLS Cup by beating Kansas City, 3-2. (You do not want to miss the video below!)
An OSU student with white nationalist ties has been convicted of hate crimes, and unsurprisingly looks exactly like a goddamn creep.
Now let's look skyward to the WEATHER: Another showery day with a high of 49, though a drying trend starts this weekend.
And finally, check out this MASSIVE and insane goal from the Timbers' Sebastián Blanco that helped the team advance to the MLS Cup. WOW.
This is just other worldly from Seba Blanco. Goodness. #OnwardRoseCity #RCTID #CelebrateThanks pic.twitter.com/4oUDdoJAhQ
— Portland Timbers (@TimbersFC) November 30, 2018