'Twas the week before Christmas, when Portland said "fuck it" and started opening up a bunch of really good gifts really early. Gifts like John Legend putting on one smooth-as-hell Christmas show. Or Natasha Leggero and Moshe Kasher delivering an acidic one-two punch at Helium for those who like their holidays a lot spicier than some. Or Aminé coming back home with Buddy in tow to turn the Roseland into his personal playground. And just in case the season is really starting to step on your last nerve, the OK Chorale is here to remind you to Cheer the FUCK Up! It's a big, busy week-before-Christmas. Hit the links below and load your plate accordingly.


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Monday, Dec 17

Gina Yashere
Fresh off a featured spot in season two of Netflix's The Standups, the London-hailing comedian and Senior British Correspondent for The Daily Show brings her stand-up to the Mission Theater stage for Portland stop on a West Coast tour. (8 pm, Mission Theater, $15-20)

Cults, Munya
QuĂ©bĂ©cois musician Munya kind of sounds like the Cranberries’ Dolores O’Riordan—who passed away this year, leaving my face in a permanent frown—singing breathily in French over entrancing synth-pop. In 2018 Munya released her first two EPs, and she plans to release a third early next year. North Hatley layers woozy, Mac Demarco-style guitar riffs over cruise-controlled beats and sweet lyrics, like those on “Des Bisous Partout” (which translates to “kisses everywhere”). Her second EP, Delmano, includes the charming ode to ghosting “If I’m Gone Tomorrow (It’s Because of Aliens)” and “Hotel Delmano,” which might be Munya’s best song yet, made great with bongos, a mystical synth line, and layered, siren-like harmonies. Munya only has a few tracks to her name, but she’s already created a swirling pink fog in pop heaven that’ll hopefully linger for quite a while. (9 pm, Mississippi Studios, $18-20) CIARA DOLAN

Bernhoft & the Fashion Bruises, Moorea Masa & the Mood
The Norwegian crooner and his backing band bring their neo-soul and R&B stylings back through the Doug Fir Lounge for an intimate Portland shop supporting their upcoming album, Humanoid. (9 pm, Doug Fir, $18-20)

The Dark Crystal
Following The Empire Strikes Back (specifically the realization of Yoda, who gave the best performance in that film), creative genius Jim Henson saw his chance to go for broke and realize one of his biggest dreams: a big budget, straight-faced, pseudo-realistic muppet epic. Unfortunately, The Dark Crystal falls short as a story—it’s dumb and boring, two things a fantasy film should never be. But it excels as a testament to the unparalleled levels of craft and care Henson’s crew put into making the film. You don’t watch because of its quality as a fairy tale. You watch because it’s Henson at his visual peak. (7 pm, Clinton Street Theater, $5) BOBBY ROBERTS

Comfort and Joy: A Classical Christmas
Conductor Norman Huynh leads the Oregon Symphony and the Oregon Chorale through a mix of your favorite seasonal arrangements, culminating with a traditional sing-along that's sure to put you in the holiday spirit. (7:30 pm, Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, $25-55)

My People's Market: Holiday Pop-Up
My People’s Market has put on some impressively massive functions for POC entrepreneurs to showcase their creations and reach their target audience in a fun and family-friendly environment. This year, My People’s Market is bringing its holiday pop-up marketplace boasting more than 30 POC-owned vendors to the newly remodeled Lloyd Center every day until December 29. Happy Holidays indeed! (10 am, Lloyd Center Mall) JENNI MOORE


Tuesday, Dec 18

Cheer The F**k Up: An OK Chorale Holiday Pop Songs Sing-Along
It’s only three days until C-day, and you’re already sick of all the usual Christmas tunes. Tonight, Portland’s OK Chorale will chase those twinkly silver-bell songs out of your head with “Cheer the F**K Up!,” an evening of singing along to music you actually like, such as Prince, Joni Mitchell, and the Pogues. Have a drink or three, and take those long-suffering vocal cords out for a night on the town. (Tues-Wed 7:30 pm, Mississippi Studios, $18-20) NED LANNAMANN

Finehouse, Prom Queen
Before her untimely death in 2011, English singer/songwriter and five-time Grammy winner Amy Winehouse had one of the most interesting voices in the world—it was booming, gravelly, and weird, but totally hypnotic. Inspired by 1960s groups like the Ronettes (right down to her winged eyeliner and towering beehive hairdo), her music lives on in a shimmering blend of R&B, jazz, and soul. Portland’s own 10-piece band Finehouse will pay tribute to the late Winehouse by playing her last record, 2006’s Back to Black, all the way through with a full horn section and backup singers. They’ll be joined by Seattle’s Prom Queen (one of my favorite acts in the Pacific Northwest), whose new album, Doom-Wop, draws from the same toxic bubblegum reference points as Winehouse’s work. (8 pm, Alberta Rose Theatre, $15) CIARA DOLAN

Lovelytheband, The Interrupters, RAF
The Los Angeles-hailing indie pop trio headed up by vocalist Mitchy Collins, guitarist Jordan Greenwald, and drummer Sam Price swing through the Crystal Ballroom to head up a "December to Remember" show supporting their debut full-length, Finding It Hard to Smile . (8 pm, Crystal Ballroom, $22.50)

Grindhouse Film Festival: Silent Night, Deadly Night
It’s time for the Hollywood’s annual screening of the 1984 grindhouse flick Silent Night, Deadly Night. It’s no Black Christmas, but 1984’s inevitable Santa-turns-slasher bloodbath has a few likeable qualities nonetheless: You’ve got your sex with nuns, you’ve got a multitude of arbitrary victims introduced and subsequently murdered in roughly one half of one scene, not to mention a smattering of increasingly ludicrous Christmas songs that all seem to be composed specifically for the movie. On the downside, you’ve got the needlessly expository first two-thirds of the movie, plus perhaps the least convincing horror villain of all time: a dashing, doe-eyed WASP-y dude in a Santa suit whose creepy one liners alternate between the equally un-scary “Puuunish!” and “Naaaw-tee!”—delivered in a nearly unintelligible monotone. (7:30 pm, Hollywood Theatre) ZAC PENNINGTON

Ricci Rich: A Christina Ricci Drag Show
Is Christina Ricci an icon? Probably not. Should she be? If you didn't think so before you attended this show, you're damn sure gonna think so once you experience the Ricci-ticci-tastic performances spanning her filmography, with routines by Valerie DeVille, Marla Darling, Wanda Bones, Clare Apparently, Baby LeStrange, and many more. (Tues-Wed 9 pm, Crush, $10)

Human Solutions' Annual Toy Drive
It’s your chance to be Santa (or other non-secular gift-bearing character)! Human Solutions, a nonprofit supporting houseless and poor families gain self-sufficiency, is collecting donations for gifts to be distributed directly to children in need within the Portland metro. Needs including children’s clothing, $25 gift cards to teen-friendly establishments like Old Navy and Regal Cinema, toys for all ages, books, art supplies, and more. Check online for full wish list. Deliveries can be made through December 20th. (9 am, Human Solutions) EMILLY PRADO


Wednesday, Dec 19

Peacock Lane
SCARF UP, MOTHERFUCKERS! It's time to get your eggnog-loving ass to Peacock Lane, which starting TONIGHT will blaze and burn with SO MUCH GODDAMN CHRISTMAS CHEER that your eyes will shoot out jets of scalding-hot mulled wine! For over 80 years, the residents of Peacock Lane have gone bugfuck shitcrazy with Christmas lights—and my sources on the Lane are whispering that this year is gonna be a particularly mind-blowing orgasm of electric insanity! Will there be a hot cocoa booth? FUCKING OF COURSE THERE WILL BE, AND I'M GOING TO DRINK ALL OF IT. (6 pm, Peacock Lane, free, all ages, through Dec 31) ERIK HENRIKSEN

John Legend: A Legendary Christmas
A few years ago, I got really mad when I tried to Google “John Lennon” and it auto-populated “John Legend.” But the EGOT winner has more than earned his place atop search engine results, with a multi-pronged talent, a long history of philanthropy, and a more-vital-than-ever sense of social awareness. Tonight, Legend will be singing Christmas songs, proving his cross-generational appeal. (8 pm, Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, $69.50-149.50, all ages) NED LANNAMANN

Publication Fair 2018
The tenth annual celebration of books, local booksellers, and publishers, with participants including Mother Foucault's, Monograph, Container Corps, Eberhardt Press, Floating World Comics, Tin House, Passages, and many more. (noon, The Cleaners at the Ace Hotel, free)

Re-run Theater: Christmas in Space
It’s become the Hollywood’s gift to the city, this annual slew of freaky-ass, nostalgic sci-fi Christmas junk: The utterly execrable Star Wars Holiday Special, paired perfectly with the weirdest goddamned commercials they can find, done up as big and bewilderingly as possible, because this year is the 40th anniversary of the night Bruce Vilanch and company wiped their ass with Star Wars and smeared the wadded remains all over CBS’ cameras. In its defense (LOL jk there is no defense for this shit), the Boba Fett cartoon is pretty cool. (7:30 pm, Hollywood Theatre) BOBBY ROBERTS

Brooklyn Bust-Up
The December edition of Bar 33's new stand-up showcase is a gift for local stand-up fans, including sets from Jake Silberman, Katie Nguyen, Thomas Lundy, Cam Strong, Heather McGowan, Mike Lindsey, Scott DiBenedetto, and Robert Gresham! (8 pm, Bar 33 Brooklyn, free)

John Grant, Two Medicine
The Denver-hailing singer/songwriter and former member of the Czars brings his heartfelt and humorous solo stuff to the Star Theater stage in support of his latest full-length, Love is Magic. (9 pm, Star Theater, $21)


Thursday, Dec 20

Aminé, Buddy
I think by now we’re all familiar with AminĂ©, the Portland-raised rapper who went viral in 2016 with hit single “Caroline.” AminĂ© also recently got attention for paying for a “Yes, There Are Black People In Portland” billboard. Playing dual hometown shows right around the holidays has become something of a tradition for the rapper ever since being launched into the mainstream, and typically he brings along some surprise guest performers. This year the bill’s got support in Compton rapper/singer Buddy, who is just as deserving of a major spotlight. His debut album Harlan & Alondra contains exceptional gems, like “Trouble On Central,” “Shameless,” and especially single/closing track “Shine.” (Thurs-Fri 8 pm, Roseland, $25, all ages) JENNI MOORE

Natasha Leggero & Moshe Kasher
One of comedian Natasha Leggero’s greatest strengths is her crowd work, and now that’s she’s married to (the also very funny) Moshe Kasher, this pair of laugh-makers are legitimately qualified to offer their audiences on-point relationship advice. Though it shouldn’t be very difficult, drag your partner to this show, confess your deepest relationship problems to Natasha and Moshe, and prepare to be buried alive underneath a pile of hilarious knowledge, opinions, and (of course) jokes from this charming dynamic duo of comedy. (8 pm, Helium Comedy Club, $25) WM. STEVEN HUMPHREY

The Big Lebowski
At first it was just a weird, low-key almost-misfire in the Coen brothers’ canon. And then it was an underrated work of layered comedic genius. And then it became this whole culty thing complete with festivals and cosplayers and idiots in bathrobes blocking traffic with marching bands playing jazzy versions of “Hotel California” on their way to the theater. And now? Now, it’s just The Big Lebowski again, a properly-rated work of layered comedic genius. (7:30 pm, Clinton Street Theater) BOBBY ROBERTS

Mama Bird Recording Co.'s 2nd Annual Winter Wassail
Since its founding in 2011, Portland’s Mama Bird Recording Co. has maintained a small but impressive roster of mostly local artists, and also served as a launchpad for internationally recognized acts like Saintseneca, Courtney Marie Andrews, and Haley Heynderickx. Tonight, on the eve of the winter solstice, Mama Bird is hosting its second annual Winter Wassail, with performances from most of the label’s current artists, including folk balladeers Barna Howard and Vikesh Kapoor, singer/songwriter Faustina Masigat, country troubadours Matt Dorrien and Taylor Kingman, folk-rock minstrel Nick Delffs, rowdy country outfit Denver, and more. There will also be DJs, raffle prizes, and, of course, plenty of warm drinks to help ease the transition into another long and discontented winter. (7 pm, Mississippi Studios, $10-12) SANTI ELIJAH HOLLEY

Jerry David Decicca, Mike Coykendall, Adam Ostrar
With one record under his belt this year, singer/songwriter Jerry David DeCicca gently hurried out a follow-up with a title reflective of the spirit in which it was recorded: Burning Daylight. The trick is that the new record doesn’t feel rushed or frantic; the songs amble along in the manner of early ’70s Neil Young and the Dead. DeCicca has a tale to tell, but he takes his sweet time recounting the details. And as it was recorded live to tape in a West Texas studio with band of fellow wanderers, it has immediacy and fervor. (8 pm, Turn! Turn! Turn!) ROBERT HAM

Tents, Bridal Veil, Kelli Schaeffer
A trio of local outfits head over to the Doug Fir Lounge to warm you up with a dynamic array of art pop, shoegaze, and experimental indie rock sounds. (9 pm, Doug Fir, $8-10)

Don't forget to check out our Things To Do calendar for even more things to do!