preach, brother!

Sorry Dan but your response to this poor person is totally unprofessional. You obviously were wearing your gay blinders when you totally missed the fact that the writer makes no mention of his desires being for other men, in fact he describes his desires as being those of "most any 20 year old man's", which as you know statistically does not imply homosexuality at all. He might be thinking about men, but he could also be thinking about girls, BDSM, or going furry - he doesn't say. Yet you come out the door blasting with hurtful terms like "get over yourself faggot" and "like the cocksucker you are."

You unleashed every bit of your rage at religious gay bashers (unto itself totally justified) on to this innocent person who was sincerely seeking your help. Nothing about your tone was in any way supportive. Your smug and condescending assertion that "you do know that God doesn't exist right?" is a perfect example of how some atheists can be just as annoying and small-minded as the overzealously religious. You really don't know the answer to that question Dan, and stating that to a young person who is confused about their spirituality and sexuality offers ZERO help. Seriously Dan, were you angry drunk when you wrote this? I think organized religion sucks cosmic donkey balls too, but this young person is clearly a victim of its shitiness, not a purveyor.

You owe him an apology. Whether he's gay or not, he confided in you sincerely that he felt he had nowhere else to turn and you basically shit in his mouth. How would you feel if he ended up killing himself?

I still count myself as a big fan but you went totally off the rails on this one. It's time you took your own advice about self introspection, sober up, and write him back with a response that is worthy of your reputation as a compassionate and open-minded person who is dedicated to helping people with their sexuality.

Not 100% clear but I agree w Dan that the writer is probably gay. Notice he did not talk about waiting to get married to have sex but instead being celibate for life.
The kid is going to have to come to terms with it, the sooner the better for his mental health. Easiest thing to do is jettison organized religion or at least find a denomination that is more tolerant and open. It is also possible to believe in God without believing a single thing in the Bible. Just be a good person and follow the Golden Rule.

@3 for sure there are many happy gays who believe in religion, not that that is my cup of tea. Once again THERE IS NOTHING IN THE WRITERS STATEMENT THAT IMPLIES THAT HIS SO-CALLED UNHOLY THOUGHTS ARE ABOUT MEN, NOT THAT THAT WOULD MAKE A DIFFERENCE. This person was writing about having a conflict between their religious teachings and his desires. You don't tell someone "get over yourself faggot" when they are reaching out for help reconciling their religious teachings with their sexual desires. SHAME. YOU. TOO.

Once again:"He might be thinking about men, but he could also be thinking about girls, BDSM, or going furry - he doesn't say. Yet you come out the door blasting with hurtful terms like "get over yourself faggot" and "like the cocksucker you are."

Fuck this abusive and presumptive tone. Once again, how would you feel if you found out this young person killed themselves after being shunned by the most accessible "sexpert" available? Again I say this as a fan of Dan Savage although I think he basically fired a gun at an innocent young person.

Check the tone of Dan's response and tell me it's okay to talk to anyone like that, regardless of their true orientation.

@7👍