The Thorns fell to the Chicago Red Stars 1-0 in a semifinal matchup Sunday afternoon in Chicago. FLAILING ARMS AND YELLING IN AN EMPTY PARKING LOTâHOW DID THIS HAPPEN?
With this loss, the Thorns end their 2019 season and weâll have to MOURNFULLY WATCH the 2019 Championship match WITHOUT the Thorns. Sorry if I audibly gag when I type this, but the North Carolina Courage (Yecch) will play the Chicago Red Stars for the 2019 NWSL Championship on October 27 in North Carolina (Blegh).
Iâm not bitter. ARE YOU? Go ahead, JUDGE ME, while I SCREAM TYPE this blog. IâLL BE OK.
JUST ONE GOAL
It was just one goal that decided this match and it came from the top scorer in the league, Australian superstar Sam Kerr in the eighth minute of the match. UGH. SHEâS LIKABLE, COOL, AND SO GOOD AT SOCCER.
The connection of @Yuki_Ogimi âĄď¸ @samkerr1 picked up right where it left off from the regular season.
See how @chiredstarsPR took an early lead.
1-0 | #CHIvPOR on ESPN2 pic.twitter.com/bx8LsuPgZC
â NWSL (@NWSL) October 20, 2019
But trust me, the Thorns didnât just roll over and hand the Red Stars the win. O HELL NO! There were HEAVY shots from Raso and Purceâand Sinclair and BrynjarsdĂłttir served some sassy passies upfrontâBUT NOTHING HIT THE NET! The game and result were as disappointing as my childâs size Beyond Burger and seven fries I ordered from the sports bar I was at.
IN THE END
Look it was a great seasonâit was weird with all the national team breaks and stuffâbut it was also a great season! I know youâre feeling like the Thorns were ready and worthy of another championshipâbut HAIL MARYS AND SACRED SONICSâhow âbout we fold up our jersey, slowly back out of the room, and quietly close the door on this season? ITâS BEEN A WHIRLWIND AND THE THORNS DID JUST FINE!
In short, the 2019 Thorns season was riddled with adversity and triumph. We all enjoyed another victorious Womenâs World Cup this summer when our US Women brought home the big win and widened the worldâs eyes on soccer here in the states.The NWSL got a big bump in attendance and in sponsorshipâCOUNT THAT. In addition, Portland fans were SLATHERED WITH PLEASURE during the tournament when our home town squad broke through with hidden treasures while our national team superstars were out.
And oh, did you already forget about that new addition to our already beautiful stadium we got to enjoy for the first time this season? TOTES GORGEOUS. And guess what else, Negative Nelly? The NWSL is working on expanding up to three new cities in the next few years! Back up and take a look at all the growth weâve experienced this season and give yourselves some consensual congratulatory hugsâWE DESERVE IT.
MOVING FORWARD
Here is what Iâll do. Iâll HATE WATCH the Championship on October 27 at 1:30 pm. I donât necessarily like rooting for any other team than the Thorns, but JESUS ON A BREAKFAST TACO, I AM TIRED OF WATCHING THE COURAGE WIN. So yeah, Iâll enjoy watching someone else get beat up by the North Carolina Courage. GO RED STARS?
Letâs all take a deep breath a nice break and hope all of our superstar soccer sensations stay in the states for another top-notch NWSL season!