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The I, Anonymous Blog is a great place for rants, sure. But I think it's at its best when anonymous people like you send in their most private confessions—like the following, which will make you think twice before leaving your footwear unsecured.

We both work as servers in a restaurant. I have a thing for you, but you don’t even notice me. In fact, when we do work together, you’re mean and bossy to me (which I also kinda dig). Lately we’ve been working different shifts, and I miss that, but I’ve found a way to reconnect: You leave your silky socks in your unlocked locker and I wear them in your absence. Prior to this I would just sniff them and occasionally fuck them in the bathroom, but now I full on wear them. You wash them several times a week and I’m careful to not fuck them up. If we aren’t going to work together much anymore, at least I’ve got something to keep me on my toes.—Anonymous

YEEEEEEESH! (My apologies if this submission inspires you to burn every sock you own.) Got a rant or sticky confession to share with the world? Drop it off in the I, Anonymous Blog—where no article of clothing is safe.