Oregon, get ready for drought summer.
Oregon, get ready for drought summer. Justin Sullivan/Getty Images

Here's your daily roundup of all the latest local and national news. (Like our coverage? Please consider making a recurring contribution to the Mercury to keep it comin'!)

IN LOCAL NEWS:

ā€¢ Hope you haven't grown too attached to "water": Thanks to a dry winter and spring (and climate change, of course), around three-quarters of Oregon will be experiencing drought conditions in May and it's expected to persist through the summer.

ā€¢ This past Saturday, activists marched to Portland's ICE facility to bring attention to international workers' rights, and the plight of migrants in our country. Our Isabella Garcia was on the ground and filed this report.

ā€¢ Police are searching for the piece (or pieces) of Nazi shit who scrawled swastikas on the Oregon Holocaust Memorial in Portlandā€™s Washington Park.

ā€¢ You want to look GOOD, true or false? If "true," you'll want to purchase a new, wicked awesome Mercury T-shirt... just in time for tee season!

IN NATIONAL NEWS:

ā€¢Ā After catching shit for keeping refugee admissions at a Trump-era level, the Biden administration announced they will be increasing the migrant cap to 62,500 (up from 15,000) for this fiscal year.

ā€¢ During today's funeral for Andrew Brown Jr.ā€”a Black man fatally shot five times (including in the back of the head) by North Carolina copsā€”Rev. Al Sharpton spoke to mourning family and friends, demanding transparency from the police and the release of body cam footage of the killing, calling the bureau's response "a con game."

ā€¢ Buckle up, needle squeamish youngsters! As early as next week, reports indicate that the FDA will authorize the Pfizer COVID-19 vaccine for kids as young as 12 years old (currently 16 and older).

ā€¢ Largely thanks to thoughtless Republican butter-dicks and selfish anti-vaxxer buttholes, experts think it is highly unlikely, and perhaps we will never reach "herd immunity," which means I guess we can just all get used to wearing masks forever and randomly opening and closing businesses for the foreseeable future. (Isn't this what the GOP didn't want?)

ā€¢ After 27 years of marriage, billionaire Bill Gates and Melinda Gates are getting divorced.

ā€¢ Former president and once-and-always loser Donald Trump will find out this week whether he will be able to return to Facebook and continue spreading his particular brand of lies and bile.

ā€¢ After scrambling to enact new voter suppression rules, it's beginning to dawn on Florida Republicans that "waaaaait a minute... these draconian laws are going to make it harder for Republicans to vote for us, too!" Sigh. Life does come at you fast.

ā€¢ SCIIIIIIIENNNNNNCE!

ā€¢ Need some guaranteed laughs? Then don't miss the I, Anonymous Show (Livestream edition) featuring nutzo rants and hilarious commentary from comedians Neeraj Srinivasan, Sam Tallent, Steph Tolev, and your host Kate Murphyā€”coming at ya this Wednesday, May 5! (Act now for a FREE ticket option!)

ā€¢ HUMP! HUMP! HUMP! If you enjoy sexy stuff (and I know you do), get your tickets NOW for HUMP's Greatest Hits, Volume 3ā€”THIS WEEKENDā€”featuring some of the best short sex flicks from 15 years of HUMP! HUMP! HUMP!

ā€¢ And now... THE WEATHER REPORT: A nice sunny day tomorrow with a high of 68!

ā€¢ And finally, the best part of this video is how he keeps on keeping on... even when the staff is packing everything up around him!