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Young people around the globe—and here in Portland—are walking out of class today to demand action on the climate crisis.
Young people around the globe—and here in Portland—are walking out of class today to demand action on the climate crisis. Jan Evans / Getty Images

GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! When situations never change, tomorrow looks unsure. Don't leave your destiny to chance. What are you waiting for? LET'S GO TO PRESS.

IN LOCAL NEWS:

• Young people around the globe are walking out of school today to protest the world's inaction on the climate crisis. The Mercury will be on hand today to cover Portland's school walkouts and demonstrations.

• Multnomah County officials have announced several new initiatives to battle the area's surge in gun violence—an epidemic that's echoed nationwide—but this time doesn't lean on ineffective law enforcement to get things done. The programs include a behavioral health gun violence response team, hiring more investigators/prosecutors for the DA's office, and adopting successful violence reduction initiatives from other states. Said County Chair Deborah Kafoury, “The old war on crime approach to public safety, which leans almost exclusively on law enforcement, prosecution and punishment is both ineffective and causes profound long term harm especially on communities of color.”

• The decision on renewing a $25-million, five-year contract with the controversial downtown Clean & Safe program—which uses private money to police public property and the homeless—has been delayed for a week, after Commissioner Hardesty suggested extending the contract for one year so the council can explore the "deeper concerns" brought up in public testimony before they decide to renew (or not!).

• Confused about Oregon's current legislative redistricting drama, and what's slowing it down? Abe Asher explains it all for you (and doesn't skimp on the juicy political stuff)!

• Another reason to vote in EVERY election: The Redmond school board has voted not to fire a teacher who has endangered her students and other staff members by refusing to wear a mask, even though the firing was recommended by the school district (not to mention it's a violation of the governor's school mask mandate).

• Calling all smarty pants! It's time for our fun, weekly POP QUIZ PDX, featuring sassy Qs about extremist school boards, "erratic" rocks, and one question about Oregon football that will possibly get the author run out of town. IT'S QUIZ TIME!

IN NATIONAL/WORLD NEWS:

• The director of the CDC has overruled a panel that suggested healthcare and other high risk workers should be excluded from getting COVID-19 booster shots—a move that aligns with Biden's wishes and pleas for older Americans and health care workers to get the extra dose.

• After all that fucking audit nonsense, even the Republican auditors in Arizona agree that BIDEN WON THE ELECTION—and in fact, with more votes than originally counted. So now are they gonna ask for an audit of the audit?

• Despite what happened in Arizona (and perhaps because of it) Texas will conduct their own audit of the 2020 election after being persuaded by loser Trump. And just to add another layer of ridiculousness, TRUMP WON TEXAS.

• The House is expected to vote today on abortion legislation that would guarantee a person's right to the medical procedure, and circumvent Republican states that enact unconstitutional anti-abortion laws. It's expected to get shot down by the Senate GOP.

• The congressional committee investigating the domestic terrorist attack on the nation's capitol on January 6 have subpoenaed six former Trump advisors to testify, including former White House Chief of Staff Mark Meadows and feckless potato Steve Bannon.

• Way too little, way too late: Fox News has reportedly banned traitor Rudy Giuliani and his idiot son from their network.

• Are you ready for some sexy fun? Then don't miss HUMP! 2021—featuring tons of hotsy-totsy five-minute filthy flicks—coming at ya LIVE AND IN-PERSON at Revolution Hall for two screenings only on October 1! (You can stream it online, too!) GET THOSE TIX QUICK, it's heading toward a sell-out!

• Get ready for one of the most delicious weeks of the year! The Mercury’s WING WEEK returns Oct 4-10 with 24 creative wing dishes from your fave restaurants and bars—and they’re only $6 per plate! YES, PLEASE!

• And now... THE WEATHER REPORT: Expect sunny skies for your Friday with a toasty high of 87!

• And finally, what is Jim Carrey as the Grinch doing in a storm cloud in Istanbul?