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Thorns players huddle together for a pep talk
The National Women's Soccer League has canceled all games this weekend following abuse allegations. Courtesy of Portland Thorns FC

Happy October, Portland! Let’s get into some spoOoOoky headlines.

In local news:

• Here’s a spooky story for you: According to an internal review, US Department of Homeland Security officers complied intelligence and background reports on people arrested during racial justice protests in Portland last summer, despite their charges having nothing to do with homeland security threats. Oregon US Senator Ron Wyden said the report showed the “stunning incompetence, mismanagement and abuse of power” by federal officers while they were in Portland. YUP, YOU SAID IT RON!

• The National Women’s Soccer League is in the midst of a growing abuse scandal—and the Portland Thorns are in the middle of it. Earlier this week, a story in The Athletic revealed former Thorns coach Paul Riley harassed, intimidated, and sexually harassed at least a dozen players across several teams for years. There is ample evidence that Thorns management and the league itself knew about Riley’s abuse.

• Over 3,000 union healthcare workers at Kaiser Permanente in Oregon are preparing to strike as contract negotiations with the company stall across the country. According to local union reps, workers are asking Kaiser to meaningfully address the company’s staffing crisis, which has only been further exacerbating by the pandemic. Abe Asher has the details.

In national news:

• Millions of students in California will be required to get the COVID-19 vaccine following the FDA’s full approval of the shot for children 12 and older, which could happen by the end of the year. Governor Gavin Newsom announced the mandate for all eligible public and private school students, grades 7 through 12, on Friday. California is the first state to put forth a vaccine mandate. The Portland Public Schools board is also considering a vaccine mandate for eligible students.

• Here’s a tragic headline for you: US Coronavirus Death Toll Nears 700,000 Despite Wide Availability of Vaccines

• The US House committee investigating the January 6 Capitol insurrection sent out another round of subpoenas this week, aiming to uncover the degree to which former President and lifelong shitbag Donald Trump was involved in planning the rally that proceeded the riot. The 11 organizations and individuals subpoenaed have until October 13 to turn over the requested documents, or testify in depositions scheduled throughout the month.

Mark your calendars for these Merc events!

• Tonight’s the night! Don't miss HUMP! 2021—featuring tons of hotsy-totsy five-minute filthy flicks—coming at ya LIVE AND IN-PERSON at Revolution Hall for two screenings only on October 1! (You can stream it online, too!) GET THOSE TIX QUICK, it's heading toward a sell-out!

• Aaaand you can keep the sexy vibes rolling by seeing Dan Savage live and in-person this Saturday, October 2, for a reading of his newest book, Savage Love from A to Z, an illustrated collection of 26 never-before-published essays! (Plus, paid attendees get their own copy of the book!)

• Then, the Mercury’s WING WEEK returns Oct 4-10 with 24 creative wing dishes from your fave restaurants and bars—and they’re only $6 per plate! YES, PLEASE!

• And finally, please do me the favor of voting for “Bendy Boi” in this TriMet poll: