I, Anonymous Jul 9, 2009 at 4:00 am

I, Anonymous

One Hell of a Cow

Anonymous
Back to article

Comments

1
Oh shut up.
Marq on July 9, 2009 at 8:27 AM Report this
2
Love the new cow magnet on my fridge - thanks buddy!
Mizzzzzzz on July 9, 2009 at 9:38 AM Report this
3
Another terrible I anonymous.......

Dear guy who got his cow magnet stolen off his motorcycle -

Your an idiot. Even little kids know not to leave shit that can easily be taken lying around. Next time, take the magnet off when you leave you bike. Also, quit your bitching.
cam'ron on July 9, 2009 at 11:41 AM Report this
4
Near the hotsprings in Bath, England, is an archaeological site where people would throw rings or coins into the water along with a wish for the deity believed to inhabit the springs. (from around 2000 years ago.) Many of these wishes were for the death and/or dismemberment of people who had stolen things from them. I remember thinking that seemed so primitive and brutal. Nice to know things never change.
on July 9, 2009 at 11:43 AM Report this
5
If I ever see a fuzzy cow magnet on a motorcycle gas tank, hell, any fuzzy magnet on a motorcycle gas tank, I'm stealin that shit just because you are such an asshole.
Demondog on July 9, 2009 at 2:41 PM Report this
6
There is a name for breaking your partner's arm and then forcing them to give you a hand job?!?!?!? Like that happens enough to name it????
Finn on July 9, 2009 at 2:54 PM Report this
7
I've read the Mercury for years and I'm no prude. I fondly remember the days where it was suggested that your interns go take a nap in the rape room. Good fun!
But this was the most disgusting, disturbing, I, Anonymous ever. The "wounded seagull" is going to give me nightmares. The whiny bitch should be taken out back and shot like the dog he is. Have some standards.
rachtillian on July 9, 2009 at 6:05 PM Report this
8
Oh Kendra, shut up.
Everyone on July 9, 2009 at 8:36 PM Report this
9
Within the next month, someone's going to start a band named "Wounded Seagulls".
AlaskanNow on July 10, 2009 at 4:17 AM Report this
10
Dude, don't have a cow. We can get u an udder one.
Mr. Freedom on July 10, 2009 at 9:25 AM Report this
11
Ouch! My arm really hurts now... Oh wait, I was supposed to break HER arm!
chomp on July 10, 2009 at 12:43 PM Report this
12
I once had an orange Beavers foam football boosted off my Aerostar's antenna. I still hurt, since the ornament had added small touch o' kitschy class to my otherwise déclassé cargo van.
subnurmul on July 10, 2009 at 8:48 PM Report this
13
Wow...talk about blowing things out of proportion.

To anger management class with you, post haste!

Grow the hell up.
urchasingamy on July 11, 2009 at 7:23 AM Report this
14
You're the one throwing a dammed baby fit...maybe YOUR grandparents should get skull-fucked. I wish whiners like you would wake up missing legs. I wish YOUR motorcycle (and c'mon, we all know you ride a scooter, you liar) would have it's wheels stolen.

I am so sick of whiny-ass pieces of shits like you.

Life happens. Get over it and grow the fuck up.
gonebabygone on July 12, 2009 at 6:25 AM Report this
15
Let me guess: the letter writer is one of the douche bags who tricked out his bike with such added enhancements as a loud pipes and custom chrome, in addition to the furry cow magnet, so he could be the quasi-ironic bad ass riding around town. Consider this theft a small price you have to pay for being such a stereotypical asshat.
on July 13, 2009 at 4:28 AM Report this
16
needs more cow magnet
tw on July 13, 2009 at 2:02 PM Report this
17
What kind of a pussy wishes cancer on ones family members over a fucking magnet? Has to be an only child.
Drunk again on July 17, 2009 at 11:05 PM Report this
18
I thought this was hilarious, and made even more so by all the hypersensitive douches who missed the none-too-subtle irony of the overreaction, and are suggesting he or she needs therapy. I am not an only child, nor do I need anger management training, but I have been known to tell my husband that I hope he contracts lupus upon discovering that he's drunk the last of the OJ.
colorless green on July 23, 2009 at 10:09 PM Report this
19
Your worthless hate speech has disturbed me for weeks. What an emotionally stunted vindictive little prick you seem to be. If this is how you handle the theft of a trinket you've got a miserable life ahead of you. Check your perspective fool! And Mercury, check your editors, what a waste of space.
Big Red on July 24, 2009 at 10:40 AM Report this
20
"Your an idiot"

i love when this happens. probably too much
Gheyy on July 27, 2009 at 8:51 PM Report this
21
I hope a drunk driver hits and kills you on your Portland hipster edition motorcycle
and if you don't want something stolen try locking it up....
fuckface on September 18, 2009 at 1:16 PM Report this

Please wait...

Comments are closed.

Commenting on this item is available only to members of the site. You can sign in here or create an account here.


Add a comment
Preview
Posted by (your name here)

By posting this comment, you are agreeing to our Terms of Use.

Editors' Picks

THE TRASH REPORT: White Lines at the White House, Icky Actors, and Camel News You Can Camel-Use
POP QUIZ PDX: Lake Oswego Criminals, TriMet's Drug-Induced Panic, and Choosing Downtown Portland's Amusement Park! 🎢
POP QUIZ PDX: Pick the Next Prez, and Stop Peeing in My Cornflakes!
Low-Income Tenants Threatened by 50% Rent Hikes Successfully Delay the Increase for 18 Months
Sassy-Ass Trivia Questions About Dognapped Dogs, Kangaroo Skin, and Your Choice for a DISGUSTING License Plate
Is Portland Experimental Theatre Ensemble's The Cherry Orchard a Stage Play or a Spell?
Portland Mercury
is a proud member of the media network
Masthead Ad Info & Rates Jobs at Portland Mercury Contact Privacy Policy Terms of Use Takedown Policy
Support Portland Mercury
All contents © Index Newspapers LLC
PO Box 86208, Portland, OR 97286