Kalah Allen

A grocery store is a place of business, not your own personal pigpen. Countless times, I've found half-eaten foods shoved onto shelves leaking into other new products that could otherwise be sold, and unopened stinky rotting packages that were once frozen or refrigerated, but that you decided you didn't want and were simply too lazy to walk your fat asses back to return. The deli foods that YOU ORDERED, if you must dine and dash, could at least be tossed in one of the numerous garbage cans around the store rather than stuffed behind the tampons three feet away, (which you could purchase in whole packages instead of stealing just one), and this is only the tip of the iceberg. However, I DO have the last laugh everytime I open the ice cream and lick it before stocking it, or when I refill the bulk bins with product that was on the floor. I chuckle to myself as I sneeze on the produce, or spit into the deli soups that you'll be purchasing the next day, or allow frozen meat and dairy products to completely thaw before stocking them. There really are so many ways I repay you for your kindness as a shopper, and if you aren't worried because you're sure you don't shop where I work, well, I have news for you--I learned these little tricks from others just like me. We are everywhere! Shop 'til you drop, rude scums of society, and now you can rest assured that your groceries may have been properly seasoned with my bodily fluids. Mmmmmmm!!!--Anonymous