Kalah Allen
Dog Damnit!

This used to be my favorite coffee shop. That is, until you inconsiderate assholes started showing up with your huge, hairy, wet, stinking dogs. It's fucking unbelievable. Yesterday I had to leave before I finished my coffee because the person I was with was so allergic to your filthy animal that she couldn't breathe. Isn't there a health code law about bringing non-service dogs into businesses that sell food? The stench alone is enough to put me off my coffee. So now I have to keep sliding my table and chair backward to avoid your disgusting, wet dog that is inching ever closer to my new black wool coat, while you sit there tapping away on your wireless laptop enjoying your coffee. Listen asshole, if you can't bear to be separated from your stinking mutt, then you'd better get your latte to go. You can keep each other company outside, next to the fire hydrant where you both belong. --Anonymous