Having a heart attack in the next few days? Well, better reschedule, because it's SEASON FINALE WEEK! And no season finale is more exciting than The O.C. 's, which winds up this Thursday, May 19, at 8:00 p.m. on Fox. Will Ryan murder his brother for trying to rape Marissa? Will Seth succumb to the pressures of comic book success? Will Sandy's mono brow continue to circle around his head? OMIGOD, I'm SO excited--there aren't enough adult diapers in the world to hold my urine!

Anyway! To get us into the mood, I've concocted the most fiendishly diabolical "I Love Television™" Snap Quiz™ yet! And it's all about The O.C. ! (Unfamiliar with the show? Then perhaps you'd like to join the rest of us in the 21st century! Snap!) The answers are below, so no cheatin', jerko. See ya at the Bait Shop!

1. What's the name of Seth Cohen's plastic horse?

2. Name Summer's fave TV show ever! BONUS: Name Summer's second fave TV show ever!

3. Why is Ryan so much more boring now than last season?

4. Last year, despondent Seth set sail in his catamaran for Tahiti. Where did the dumbshit actually end up?

5. Ryan's brother Trey was sent to the pokey for what criminal offense?

6. What's the name of Seth, Ryan, and Zach's comic book club? BONUS: According to Ryan, what's the actual purpose of this club?

7. What's the idiotic name of Seth and Zach's comic book ("graphic novel!")? BONUS: Name the gang's superhero counterparts in the comic book ("graphic novel!").

8. If Kirsten's not drinking white wine, she's drinking red wine, and if she's not drinking red wine, she's drinking what?

9. What's the two-word code for the alarm at the Cohen residence? BONUS: Why is this boring bit of trivia significant?

10. What's the name of Julie Cooper's porno from the '80s?

11. According to hubby Caleb, Julie has slept with three men since they've been married. Name them.

12. Put the following drippy, disposable girlfriends in order from least drippy to drippiest: Theresa, Lindsay, Anna, Francesca, Alex, Rebecca.

13. Is Marissa (Mischa Barton) a better actress than she was last season? BONUS: Defend your answer.

ANSWERS! 1. Captain Oats. 2. The Valley. BONUS: Golden Girls. 3. Because he doesn't get into any fights. 4. Portland, Oregon. 5. Stealing a car. 6. Comic Book Club. BONUS: Listening to Seth whine about Summer. 7. Atomic County. BONUS: Seth = The Ironist, Ryan = Kid Chino, Marissa = Cosmo Girl, Summer = Little Miss Vixen. 8. Vodka. 9. Greased Lightning. BONUS: Peter "Sandy" Gallagher made his Broadway acting debut in 1978 as Danny Zuko in Grease. See? BORING! 10. The Porn Identity. 11. Luke, Jimmy, and Lance (the pornographer). 12. Francesca (Zach's imaginary girlfriend, and therefore least drippy), Alex, Theresa, Lindsay, Rebecca (Sandy's old g-friend), and Anna (the drippiest drip in Drip Town). 13. No. BONUS: Though temporarily more interesting as a lesbian, she's back to being just plain awful.