Finding fresh material for this column--scouring print, broadcast, and electronic media--is always a challenge worth undertaking. Recently, I found a reference to Vaginismus, and set my sights on researching this potentially humorous sexual malady. My findings? Vaginismus is an involuntary clamping shut of the vagina.

Although the most familiar example of sexual dysfunction is Erectile Dysfunction Disorder (see Bob Dole), women have their fair share of sexual disorders as well, such as incontinence during intercourse, and Vaginismus.

The prime fact (revealed by my research) is that Vaginismus ain't funny. It's an instinctual defense mechanism triggered by a violent sexual encounter. Vaginismus is painful. It's an intense muscle spasm that causes excruciating pain to sufferers' bodies, as well as to the penis of the abusive husband, father, or blackjack rapist who attempts to penetrate the vagina. The more I learn, the more I think this isn't going to fit in It Sure Is A Scientific World.

Ideally, I need to find a bug that extrudes microprocessors, or to announce the discovery of a giant squid that humps offshore oil rigs. Something funny. Vaginismus is about as funny as a murder. It's a serious condition that can often last a lifetime, and potentially occludes the possibility of sufferers ever experiencing healthy sexuality. So, instead of referencing Vaginismus, I'll mention two hilarious science web sites that are far more entertaining.


This Stephen Hawking Gangsta Rap Web Crib ( is a laugh riot. The site includes an MC Hawking discography, MP3s, and "lyricz" from this unlikely "Lyrical Terrorist," as well as numerous photos of Hawking, bedecked in hip hop duds, hanging with his gangsta homies Chuck D, Ice T, Slim Shady, & the Beastie Boys.

Britney's Guide to Semiconductor Physics

A wondrous combination of the workings of semiconductor data and sassy Britney Spears bubblegum pics, the site includes everything you ever wanted to know about the subject, including a helpful Britney Spears Lipglossary of Semiconductor Physics Terms, in case you need to bone up (

Now that's funny.